


The Disney Version

by SosaLola



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Disney - All Media Types
Genre: Disney Songs, F/F, F/M, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-29
Updated: 2016-09-05
Packaged: 2018-08-11 19:12:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 22,671
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7904341
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SosaLola/pseuds/SosaLola
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The show's story retold through Disney songs. </p><p>Chapter One: Xan-Pan<br/>Chapter Two: The Little Witches<br/>Chapter Three: The Vengeance Demon of Sweden <br/>Chapter Four: Beauty and the Vampire<br/>Chapter Five: Buffy and the Seventy Potentials<br/>Chapter Six: And They Lived Happily Ever After</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Xan-Pan

**Author's Note:**

> Press on the song title to hear the song while reading the lyrics.

Banner made by  _ **Javajunkie247**_

 

 

** Episode: ** Teacher's Pet

** Song: [Can You Feel the Love Tonight? (The Lion King)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=25QyCxVkXwQ) **

 

 

 

 

Buffy stepped away from Xander and rushed towards a strange man by the Bronze’s doorway, standing half in the shadows. He fitted the definition ‘talk, dark and handsome’ to the T with the bonus tortured soul glint in his eye and the hunched board shoulders. The phony bad boy act all girls fall for.

But not Buffy. She was smarter than that. Right? Buff?  

Xander hoped Blayne didn’t catch Buffy running off on him. His manly ego was too bruised as it was. "Who's that?" he muttered to Willow next to him.

"That must be Angel! I think?"  

"That weird guy that warned her about all the vampires?" 

"That's him, I'll bet you." 

It killed him that Buffy never looked this happy and excited to see him. "Well, he's buff. She never said anything about him being buff."  

"You think he's buff?" Willow teased. 

"He's a very attractive man. How come that never came up?" he mumbled, upset. All of a sudden, Angel took off his leather jacket and handed it to Buffy, revealing the muscular arms Xander feared to see.

"Oh, right. Give her your jacket. It's a balmy night, no one needs to be trading clothing out there!" he spitted out in scornful disdain.

Buffy and Angel resumed talking, and all of a sudden heart shaped bubbles glowing red started to fly and pop above their heads. Xander’s own heart tightened because as anticipated, music filled up the room and it wasn't coming from the DJ. It was this weird musical thing they had been experiencing for the past week. The demon behind this was yet to be found.

Lyrics were about to burst out of his mouth. He was too upset with the Buffy and Angel flirtage to block them in.

 **Xander:** _I can see what's happening_

 **Willow:** _What?_

 **Xander:** _And she doesn't have a clue_

 **Willow:** _Who?_

 **Xander:** _She'll fall in love and here's the bottom line  
Our trio's down to two._

 **Willow:** _Oh_

 **Xander in a sarcastic mock-French accent:** _Ze sweet caress of twilight_  
 **Back to normal, but still sarcastic:** _There's magic everywhere_  
 _And with all this romantic atmosphere  
Disaster's in the air_  
  
 **Buffy and Angel's pink floating hearts:** _Can you feel the love tonight?  
The peace the evening brings  
The world, for once, in perfect harmony  
With all its living things_  
  
 **Angel inward:** _So many things to tell her  
But how to make her see  
The truth about my past? Impossible!  
She'd turn away from me_  
  
 **Buffy inward:** _He's holding back, he's hiding_  
But what, I can't decide  
Why won't he be the guy I know he is  
The guy I see inside?

 **Buffy and Angel's pink floating hearts:** _Can you feel the love tonight?_  
The peace the evening brings  
The world, for once, in perfect harmony  
With all its living things  
Can you feel the love tonight?  
You needn't look too far  
Stealing through the night's uncertainties  
Love is where they are

 **Xander:** _And if she falls in love tonight  
It can be assumed_

 **Willow:** _Her carefree days with us are history_  
  
 **Together:** _In short, our friend is doomed_

Shaking their heads in compassion, Xander and Willow turned away and left the love birds continue their chat.

 

 

 

 

~*~*~*~

 

** Episode: ** Prophecy Girl

** Song: ** [After Today (A Goofy Movie)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FoIFa94fD3c)

 

 

 

Xander shifted from foot to foot, standing by the school's balcony. They had science class for their first period and he couldn't wait. Today was the day. Biggest day. Not because it was the last day of school, but 'cause he would ask Buffy out on a date for the Spring Fling dance. He should be more confidant and forward. Girls liked guys like that. He should be confident. He had practiced for hours on Willow last night, why wasn't he confident? Would she reject him? Man, he wished it was tomorrow, so he would skip the whole pressure of waiting to know the answer.

"Excuse me." A girl pushed him gently out of the way. Amongst all the nervous shifting, that light touch sent him falling down the stairs with a yelp.

The pain was mild because his butt took this one for the team. But the laughter of ridicule from all the students who saw the latest episode of ‘humiliate the Xander’ was painfully annoying.

Glaring at himself, he started making his way up the stairs.

 **Xander:** _They've been laughin' since I can't remember  
But they're not gonna laugh anymore  
_ _No more "Xander the Geek",_ _  
_ _No more "Goof of the Week"_ _  
_ _Like before_ __  


Amy and Larry were about to go down the stairs. Larry raised an intimidating eyebrow at him.

 **Amy:** _No more algebra tests 'til September_

 **Larry:** _No more lookin' at losers like him_

Xander made a face at him. Of course, it was followed by him running away, going past Jonathan who was struggling to open his locker. Behind Johnathan walked Percy and his puff buds. One of Percy's buddies stole Jonathan's lunch bag without the poor guy noticing.

 **Percy:** _No more having to cheat_

 **Thief Boy:** _No more mystery meat_

Geeky boys stuffed inside lockers started to jump out.

 **Geek 1:** _No more gym!_

 **Geek 2:** _No more gym!_

 **Geek 3:** _No more gym!_

Jonathan's locker finally snapped open and Geek 4 jumped out.  

 **Geek 4:** _NO MORE GYM!_

Cordelia and Harmony approached. Cordelia's boyfriend, Mitch, was trying to catch up to them.

 **Cordelia:** _Gonna move to the mall_

 **Mitch:** _Gonna live in the pool_

Mitch started to flirt with Cordelia, until Xander popped in.

 **Xander:** _Gonna talk to Buffy and not feel like a fool_

Mitch walked away, the moment was ruined, and an irritated Cordelia punched Xander on the arm.

 **Students:** _'Cause after today I'm gonna be cruisin'_

 **Xander:** _After today, she'll be mine!_

 **Students:** _After today my brains'll be snoozing_

 **Xander:** _If I don't faint, I'll be fine!_

Willow walked nearby with her textbooks.

 **Willow:** _I've got forty more minutes of Home Economics_

Percy walked past Willow, knocking off her textbooks to the floor.

 **Percy:** _Then down with the textbooks_

 **Tucker's brother:** _And up with the comics!_

 **Xander:** _Just think of all the time I've been losing  
Finding the right thing to say_

 **Students:** _But things'll be going my way after today_

Buffy and Willow walked past Xander. He waved at Buffy, but she didn't notice through Willow's whining over Percy's rude behavior.

 **Xander:** _She looked right through me_  
And who could blame her?  
I need a new me

He walked confidently to the balcony.

**Xander:** _The charm-est guy in the town  
And not a bit of an Angel clown_

_And…_

From the balcony, he could see the school bus arriving with students pouring out.

 **Students:** _After today, I'm gonna be cruising_

**Grunge Girls:** _No more pep rallies to cut  
Blech!_

 **Students:** _After today my brains'll be snoozing_

 **Bus Driver:** _I'm gonna sit on my butt_

 **Xander:** _I've got less than an hour_  
And when this is ended  
She will be my girlfriend

He bumped into Snyder, which made Snyder, of course, displeased.

 **Snyder:** _Or you'll be suspended!_

 **Students:** _Just think of all the time I've been losing_  
Waiting until I could say  
Gonna be on my own  
Kiss the parents good-bye  
Gonna party from now

 _'til the end of July_  
Things'll be goin' my way  
After today

The bell rang announcing the beginning of the first period.  
  
 **Xander:** _I wish that this was the day_  
 _After today_  
   
He spotted Buffy and Willow going into the science lab.  
   
"After science class," he murmured nervously.  
  


 

  
   
~*~*~*~

 

  
  
 **Episode:** Reptile Boy  
 **Song:** [The Work Song (Cinderella)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZOe6Nsf-KGA)  
 

 

  
   
Buffy having problems with Angel? Good. Buffy thinking about dating Tom? Bad. Not because he was a college guy, but because he wasn't Xander. Xander sighed in frustration, when would Buffy start to see that he was the one for her? She always went for those older guys who brought nothing but agonizing new Celebrity Dead Match seasons headaches, to her and Xander as well.  
   
Buffy spun around, stopping their walk, and looking at her friends in anger.  
   
"Why does every conversation between me and Angel has to be about some evil demons coming? Why can't we have a normal conversation?"  
   
"Because he doesn't see you as a girl, he sees you as _the slayer_. A working machine, nothing else," Xander spoke out of spite but it did make Buffy's expression change from angry to thoughtful.  
   
"Buffy!" Giles' shout was heard from the end of the hall.  
   
Buffy huffed. "What now?" She looked wearily at the direction of Giles' call.  
   
"Maybe he discovered that you were lying about your mom being sick," Willow guessed with a disapproving look.  
   
Buffy sighed.  
   
 **Buffy:** _Buffy, Buffy, Buffy, Buffy_  
 _All I hear is Buffy, Buffy,_  
 _from the moment I get up_  
 _till shades of night are falling_  
 _There isn't any letup,_  
 _I hear them calling, calling_  
 _Go out and kill the monsters_  
 _then dust the nest of vampires,_  
 _you can do them both together_  
 _Buffy, Buffy_    
  
She looked at Xander and Willow with a sad smile.  
   
 **Buffy:** _How lovely it would be_  
 _if I could live in my fantasy_  
 _But in the middle of my dreaming_  
 _they're screaming_  
 _at me_  
 _Buffy, Buffy_  
  
"Buffy!" Giles called again, he was huffing once he reached them. "I've got some books you could look over while nursing your sick mother."  
   
Buffy sighed and walked away with Giles as he spoke his orders to her. Patrolling tonight might be better for Buffy than going to the frat party, more important, too. But then there would be orgies. Xander didn't want to miss orgies.  
  
"Poor Buffy," Willow said. "It's like she's everybody's slave. Everyone wants her to do what they want and never consider what she wants."  
   
True, Xander thought. He hated how Giles and Angel only interacted with her to order her around, never let her have fun. Xander always wished Buffy to have fun, unless it was with another boy. He nodded agreeing with Willow's words.  
  
 **Xander:** _Every time she'd find a minute_  
 _That's the time that they begin it_  
 _Buffy, Buffy, Buffy, Buffy_  
  
"Buffy! We haven't talked about your duty to me tonight!" Cordelia called after Buffy while running past a fuming Xander.   
  
 **Xander:** _Buffy, Buffy, Buffy, Buffy_  
 _Night and day it's Buffy, Buffy_  
 _Kill the demons, stop the witches_  
 _Dust the vampies, do the mopping_  
  
 **Willow:** _And still stay pretty for the party_  
 _They always keep her hopping_    
  
 **Xander:** _She goes around in circles_  
 _Till she's very, very dizzy_  
 _Still they holler_  
  
 **Willow:** _Keep a-busy Buffy, Buffy!_  
   
"You know what," Xander began. "It sucks that she has to do everything alone. Patrolling and going to parties for Cordelia… even when she has to take care of her sick mom, she's gotta research. Guess that's the description in the Slayer Non-Existing Handbook."  
   
Willow grinned. "Hey, we can help her."  
  
 **Willow:** _We can help her, we can help her_  
 _We can't wait for her to whimper_  
 _Make the initiative is so pretty_  
 _We always do it, really_  
  
 **Xander:** _I'll break into the frat house_  
 _So quiet like a mute mouse_  
 _For college boys are so_  
 _sleazy, filthy, oh, no_  
 _I won't let them lay their dirty hands on Buffy_    
  
 **Willow:** _Hurry, hurry, hurry, hurry_  
 _Gonna help our Buffy, Buffy_  
 _Got no time to dilly-dally_  
 _We gotta get a-goin'_    
  
And so it was decided, Willow was going to do the research for Buffy and Xander was going to the frat house, for nothing but noble reasons of course.  
   
   
   
  
~*~*~*~  
   
   
   
   
 **Episode:** The Zeppo  
 **Song:** [Son of Man (Tarzan)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yGKj_yB5_PI)  
   
  
   
   
"But... it's just that it's buggin' me, this 'cool' thing. I mean, what is it? How do you get it? Who doesn't have it? And who decides who doesn't have it? What is the essence of cool?" Xander complained to Oz in the school cafeteria.  

Oz reached for a chip in the bowl on the table. "Not sure." 

"I mean, you yourself, Oz, are considered more or less cool. Why is that?" 

"Am I?" Oz asked while eating the chip. 

"Is it about the talking? You know, the way you tend to express yourself in short, noncommittal phrases?" 

"Could be." 

Xander smiled. "I know! You're in a band! That's like a business-class ticket to cool with complementary mojo after takeoff! I gotta learn an instrument. Is it hard to play guitar?" 

Oz shook his head. "Not the way I play it." 

"Okay, but on the other hand: eighth grade. I'm taking the flügelhorn and gettin' zero trim. So the whole instrument thing could be a mislead." Xander paused. "But you need a thing, one thing nobody else has. What do I have?" 

"An exciting new obsession. Which I feel makes you very special," Oz teased.  

"Now with the mocking. Which I can handle because I know I'm right about this. I'm on the track. I just need to find my thing." 

"It seems like you're over-thinking it," Oz said sympathetically. "I mean, you got some identity issues. It's not the end of the world." 

Xander looked at him. "Identity issues. You mean the fact that Buffy is a slayer, Willow is a witch, Giles is a watcher, you're a werewolf and Cordelia is a bitch?" 

Oz nodded. "Identity issues." 

Xander looked down at his lap pensively. 

"Hey, listen," Oz said gently. Xander looked at him.  
   
 **Oz:** _Oh, the power to be strong_  
 _And the wisdom to be wise_  
 _All these things will_  
 _come to you in time_  
 _On this journey that you're making_  
 _There'll be answers that you'll seek_  
 _And it's you who'll climb the mountain_  
 _It's you who'll reach the peak_  
 _  
_Xander's eyes widened the second Oz started to sing. Could this be happening? Could Oz actually utter long sentences without suffocating? He looked around to see if people noticed, they did, but it didn't matter. This singing thing had been going on for three years now and it became an expected part of their lives. They already gave up looking for the cause. Plus, songs, pretty.  
 _  
_ **Oz:** _Son of Man, look to the sky_  
 _Lift your spirit, set it free_  
 _Some day you'll walk tall with pride_  
 _Son of Man, a man in time you'll be_  
  
Xander waved his hands frantically. "Okay, okay, Oz, I get it. Just stop, okay?"  
   
"Did it help?"  
   
"It was sentimental and sweet, but if you could get the wheels for the power and the wisdom to arrive faster, I'd…" An invisible lamp lit above Xander's head. "Wheels! Yes, that's what I need!"  
   
   
   
~*~*~*~  
   
   
   
Getting out of Faith's motel, Xander pulled on his jacket and got into his car. He checked himself in the rearview mirror and thought about what just happened. He just had sex. His first sexual experience ever. And with Faith no less.  
   
 **Inner Xander:** _Though there's no one there to guide you_  
 _No one to take your hand_  
 _But with Faith and sweaty sex_  
 _You will journey from boy to man_  
 __  
He sighed and looked into the back seat. There he saw the two bags of stolen ingredients and grabbed one to see what was inside. In it he found a can of kerosene, a short length of galvanized pipe with caps, wire, primer cord and an electronic timer switch. He takes a second look at the can of kerosene and realized that the "cake" really wasn't.

"Hey! They're not baking any cake," he mumbled.  

 

~*~*~*~   

 

"Ooo, look, it's Mr. Excitement," Cordelia mocked while approaching him. "On another life-or-death doughnut mission, or are we just cruising for bimbos again, giving them lessons in lack of cool?" 

He just smiled at her. If only she knew. Of course, she didn't have a clue. 

"What?" He smiled more broadly and just walked past her. 

"What?" Cordelia asked, unnerved.  

Xander just kept proudly walking away, never looking back. 

"What?!" Cordelia yelled, insistently.  
 _  
_ **Inner Xander:** _Son of Man, look to the sky_  
 _Lift your spirit, set it free_  
 _Today you're walking tall with pride_  
 _Son of Man, a man in time you'll be_

 

  
   
~*~*~*~

 

  
   
 **Episode:** Grave  
 **Song:** [Son of Man (Tarzan)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yGKj_yB5_PI)  
 

 

Giles' eyes popped open. He was still bleeding and lying on the Magic Box floor. Anya looked at him in surprise. She had one hand on his head.  
   
"What?" she asked.  
   
"It's not over," he said softly, smiling at her. He moved his hand to touch Anya's on his head.  
   
He could see Xander standing in front of Willow, desperately trying to stop her, looking so much like the hero Giles knew he was about to become. If only he could see himself now.  
   
 **Giles:** _Oh, and all the things you dreamed of_  
 _The wishes that you sought_  
 _Well, the time is drawing near now_  
 _It's yours to claim it all_  
 _  
_"What are you humming now?" Anya chided. "Stop it. You have to rest."  
 _  
_ **Giles:** _Son of Man, look to the sky_  
 _Lift your spirit, set it free_  
 _Some day you'll walk tall with pride_  
 _Son of Man, a man in time you'll be_  
 _  
_Giles smiled. "Willow has been stopped." He tried to sit up and Anya helped him.  
   
"From your smile, I assume she's still alive," Anya said.  
   
"The magic she took from me, it-it did what I hoped it would do. The gift I was given by the coven was the true essence of magic. Willow's magic came from a ... place of rage and power."  
  
"And vengeance. Don't forget vengeance," Anya pointed.  
  
"Oh. How could I? In any case, the magic she took from me tapped into ... the spark of humanity she had left. Helped her to feel again. Gave Xander the opportunity to ... reach her."  
  
"Xander?" Anya frowned.  
  
"Yes. It was he who got to her in time." He smiled at her. "He saved us all."  
   
Anya gazed at Giles, absorbing this, slowly starting to smile.  
   
Giles' smile didn't waver.  
  
 **Giles:** _Son of Man_  
 _Son of Man's a man for all to see_  



	2. The Little Witches

 

 

 

** Episode:  ** During Season Two   
** Song: [Out There (Hunchback of Notre Dame)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZxFD7Tk8Kps) **

 

 

The visual inside the increasingly glowing magical ball became more vivid. Tara could see Max as he finally asked Lily out of a date. She bit her lip and waited for the yes, hopefully there would be a kiss.

"What are you doing?" a dreadful voice asked above her.

She startled and whipped her head around to find her father loaming over her. His eyes narrowed dangerously at her magical ball. She snatched it and hid it behind her back pathetically thinking her father would let her keep it when he saw how desperate she wanted it.

He extended his hand without a single word. She knew better than disobey him. She handed him the magic ball and looked mournfully at it. It seemed to have lost its gleam in her father's hands. She waited for him to say the horrible words.

"Two more months.”

"B-but, Dad," she started weakly. She hadn't been outside her house for a long time now. While she didn't get along with her cousins, she missed interacting with people again. Her mother would have helped somehow had she still been alive.  

"When you disobey your father, you get punished. We've been through this, Tara."

She looked down at her hands. She was never out in the real world where she would interact with people who were outside her family. The only kids she knew were her cousins and she didn't get along well with them. They feared her, they feared the power she had, the power she inherited from her mother. The evil power, as her father always explained.

"Listen to me," he said. "You will not practice on such things again. Never. It only feeds the demon inside you and you know it."

Her eyes went glassy as she heard the same old lecture.

"As for your stay here, you know it's for the best. Do you think people will care for you once they know who you really are? I know who you are and I do care for you. What more do you want?" His hand went to brush on her hair. Instead of comforting her, it distressed her. "You better stay here, Tara. It's for your own good." He straightened up and headed to the door.

Tara eyed the magic ball longingly. "D-dad…" she stuttered, unsure if she could ask him to let her keep it.

He frowned at her, especially when he noticed her eyes on the ball. He approached her while his hand tightened its hold on the magic ball.

**Mr. Maclay** _**:** Magic is cruel  
Magic is wicked  
It is alone which you can't trust in this whole world  
I'm telling you as your father  
I who keep you, teach you, feed you, dress you  
I who look upon you without fear  
How can I protect you, kid, unless you  
Always stay in here  
Away in here_

  
"Remember what I taught you, Tara," he said.  
   
She nodded.  
  
 **Mr. Maclay:** _You are a demon_  
  
 **Tara:** _I am a demon_

 **Mr. Maclay:** _And you are a danger_  
  
 **Tara:** _And I am a danger_   
  
**Mr. Maclay:** _And these are crimes  
For which the world  
Shows little pity  
You do not comprehend_

 **Tara:** _You are my one defender_   
  
**Mr. Maclay:** _Out there they'll revile you  
As a monster_  
  
 **Tara:** _I am a monster_  
  
 **Mr. Maclay:** _Out there they will hate  
And scorn and jeer_  
  
 **Tara:** _Only a monster_  
  
 **Mr. Maclay:** _Why invite their calumny  
And consternation?  
Stay in here  
Be faithful to me_  
  
 **Tara:** _I'm faithful_  
  
 **Mr. Maclay:** _Grateful to me_  
  
 **Tara:** _I'm grateful_  
  
 **Mr. Maclay:** _Do as I say  
Obey  
And stay  
In here_  
  
 **Tara:** _I'll stay  
In here_

Mr. Maclay smiled and nodded. "That's my girl." He kissed her forehead and left with her magic ball.

Tara looked around her. Her room reminded her of an ancient Scottish castle with the ramparts of stone and royal bed. The only thing she liked about her room was that it was in the attic above and so full of windows. She always gazed down from the windows at the people below. When she was a kid, she used to imagine herself Rapunzel and that one day, she would drop her long golden braid down for the prince to climb up and save her.

At that thought, she jumped from her place and drew away the curtains. She looked down from her window at the people below. She wasn't allowed to interact with those who were not related to her. When her twentieth birthday would arrive, she would transform to her true demonic nature and then everybody would hate her. So it was better not make friends with them in the first place, her father's advice.   
  
**Tara:** _Safe behind these windows and these parapets of stone  
Gazing at the people down below me  
All my life I watch them as I hide up here alone  
Hungry for the histories they show me  
All my life I memorize their faces  
Knowing them as they will never know me  
All my life I wonder how it feels to pass a day  
Not above them  
But part of them_

Tara smiled at a child who grabbed an apple that fell from his mother's plastic bag. He handed the apple to his mother, but she threw it away because it was dirty now. Tara wished she was that apple. _  
  
_**Tara:** _And out there  
Living in the sun  
Give me one day out there  
All I ask is one  
To hold forever  
Out there  
Where they all live unaware  
What I'd give  
What I'd dare  
Just to live one day out there  
_

Tara watched a couple walking by. The boy wanted them to hang out at night but she preferred staying at home and studying. Tara thought she was insane. Who would want to sit home when they could get out with someone who loved them? Even those married couple ignored their children who whined because they wanted to have dinner at a restaurant, but the mother insisted they were having dinner at home.

 **Tara:** _Out there among the doctors and the teachers and their wives  
Through the roofs and gables I can see them  
Every day they shout and scold and go about their lives  
Heedless of the gift it is to be them  
If I was in their skin  
I'd treasure every instant  
  
_A bunch of schoolgirls walked by babbling about some hottie at school who wanted to date some bimbo cheerleader. They made Tara grow with excitement.

**Tara:** _Out there  
Strolling down the street  
Taste a morning out there  
Like ordinary women  
Who freely walk about there  
Just one day and then  
I swear I'll be content  
With my share_

Tara left the window and jumped on her bed. 

**Tara:** _Won't resent  
Won't despair_

She started jumping and shaking her head left and right, making her long hair fly everywhere.

**Tara** _**:** Old and bent  
I won't care  
I'll have spent_

She kept on jumping with excitement until she slipped to the floor. She looked longingly at her window, opened wide to the outer world.

**Tara:** _One day  
Out there_

 

 

~*~*~*~

 

 

** Episode: ** Family   
** Song: ** [A Whole New World (Aladdin)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aeDYx7Tkc7I)

 

 

 

 

 

Willow walked into the dorm room she shared with Tara and found her girlfriend sitting miserably on the bed, her hand caressing Miss. Kitty Fantastico's fur.

"Something wrong, baby?" Willow asked, moving to sit next to Tara.  
   
Tara startled, but recovered fast to give Willow a genuine smile. "Nothing's wrong. I'm just th-thinking… about something."  
   
"Your father?" Willow asked, her hand reaching for Tara's.  
   
"Yeah," Tara whispered.  
   
"I know I should be, well, more respectful, since he's your father and conventionally a father-in-law-y type of guy for me, but what he did to you…" Willow trailed off. "That's a big kick into the poophead scale."

   
Tara smiled. "Well, he's…"  
   
"A man with a head full of feces?"  
   
Tara chuckled. "It's just… he locked me in a room like this one." Her eyes traveled over the dark room. "For months," she murmured before looking down at Willow's hand squeezing hers. "He never let me go out. He never showed me places behind the walls of my room." She grimaced. "So dark and… tight. Makes you feel trapped."  
   
Willow tilted her head, looking suggestively at Tara. "Well, we don't really have to be 'trapped' in here if you want."  
   
Tara frowned at her. "What do you mean?"  
   
Music suddenly started filling the place. It had been five years and the world was still an enchanting musical. People in Sunnydale had gotten used to it, to the point where all the movies turned into musicals. Storylines were a copy of life, after all. It was strange and fun… she didn't mind strange and fun, not when she was holding Tara's hands, pulling her toward the window, dragging away the curtains and just watching the star filled night.  
   
 **Willow:** _I can show you the world_  
 _Shining, shimmering, splendid_  
 _Tell me, princess, now when did_  
 _you last let your heart decide?_  
 

Willow pointed a finger at the broom against the wall. It started to come to life and swiftly moved toward them and swept them off their feet. Both of them fell on it, giggling, and holding each other as the broom lifted them out of the room, away toward the deep night.  

 **Willow:** _I can open your eyes  
Take you wonder by wonder  
Over, sideways, and under  
On a magic broom ride_

They were moving so fast, Willow was shocked they didn't fall down. It was until she looked at Tara's eyes when she realized her girlfriend had glued their butts to the broom. That was Tara for those who didn't know her, always Mother Teresa. The broom took them right to the clouds.   
  
**Willow:** _A whole new world  
A new fantastic point of view  
No one to tell us no  
Or where to go  
Or say we're only dreaming_

Willow had always wondered what it felt like going through a cloud. It felt a little bit like standing in front of an air conditioner.

 **Tara:** _A whole new world  
A dazzling place I never knew  
But when I'm way up here  
It's crystal clear  
That now I'm in a whole new world   
With you  
  
_ **Willow:** _Now I'm in a whole new world with you.  
  
_ A plane was at sight, Willow with childlike glee positioned the broom to circle the plane.  

 **Tara:** _Unbelievable sights  
Indescribable feeling  
Soaring, tumbling, freewheeling  
Through an endless diamond sky  
  
_

Willow smirked noticing Giles' apartment moving toward the window. On the other hand, Tara wasn't much into the idea as she closed her eyes politely.  
 _  
_ **Tara:** _A whole new world_  
 **Willow taking Tara's hands away from her eyes:** _Don't you dare close your eyes_  
 _  
_They saw Giles getting ready to go to bed. Willow knocked on his window, getting his attention. He gasped in fright, his rope fell to reveal his Giles-y bits.

The girls gasped in return, the broom running away without their guidance.  
   
 **Tara blushing:** _A hundred thousand things to see_

 **Willow pointing at Buffy slaying:** _Hold your breath- it gets better_

A vampire was about to attack Buffy from behind while she was busy with another one. Willow and Tara grabbed the vampire and flew with him up to slam him into the nearest branch.

 **Tara:** _I'm_ _like a shooting star, I've come so far I can't go back to where I used to be_

Buffy looked up in shock and both of them waved at her. She shrugged and waved back her thanks.

 **Willow:** _A whole new world_  
 **Tara:** _Every turn a surprise_  
 **Willow:** _With new horizons to pursue_  
 **Tara:** _Every moment red letter_  
  
 **Together:** _I'll chase them anywhere, there's time to spare, let me share this whole new world with you.  
_  
Back to their room stood Willow and Tara holding each other and dancing slowly to the magical tunes.

 **Willow whispered to Tara's hair:**   _A whole new world_  
 **Tara whispered back:** _A whole new world  
_ **Willow drew her head back, looking at Tara's eyes:** _That's where we'll be  
_ **Tara smiled:** _That's where we'll be_   
**Willow moved closer:** _A thrilling chase_  
 **Tara closed her eyes:** _A wondrous place_  
 **Together so softly:** _For you and me_

Then they kissed so very gently.

 

 

~*~*~*~

 

 

 

** Episode: ** Post-Tabula Rasa.   
** Song: ** [Hakuna Matata (The Lion King)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bRF6N2L4OLY)

 

 

 

Willow sighed in desperation, watching old Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles tapes and eating her third ice cream bowl. Xander had invited her to his apartment to cheer her up, so far his list of cheering up included plenty ice cream bowls and the episode where Erma pretended to be Donatello, Willow's personal favorite, but none of that seemed to get her in a good mood.  
   
The front door swung open, revealing one Xander and plenty full plastic bags from the nearby supermarket. He emptied them on the table before her and she saw different types of chips with different flavors.  
   
She looked up at Xander and noted the disappointed look.  
   
"You haven't finished your third bowl, yet?" he asked with a headshake. "Are you missing the whole concept of wallowing?"    
   
She sighed. "Xander, I'm not sure ice cream and chips can fix what I'm going through right now."  
   
"Not even Donatello?" he asked, refereeing to her favorite turtle.  
   
"Not even Velma," she mumbled, looking down at her lap.    
   
He sat next to her, a soothing hand running on her back.  
   
"I've done some serious damage. Now I lost Tara." Willow had locked herself in the bathroom, unable to be there when Tara left. She couldn't watch her leave. She wasn't that strong. She was a coward. A coward who deserved that kind of pain for everything she had done to the ones she loved. "I'm an awful person."  
   
"No, you're not," Xander denied gently.  
   
"Yes, I am," she emphasized. "How can I have Tara back? How can I ever fix it?"  
   
"Well, what's done is done, you can't change the past. You shouldn't dwell on it, too."  
   
"But I should. I've ripped Buffy out of the only place she felt peaceful in. I've hurt her and Tara again. I've driven Tara away…" she sighed. "Maybe I should mope it out until Tara decides to forgive me… or maybe for all eternity…"  
   
"Now that's crazy talk. You can't just sit here and mope."  
   
"I can do it in my room if you want."  
   
"What? No! You gotta think ahead, you gotta live in the now. What's done is done, just… Hakuna Matata."  
   
Willow frowned. "What the huh?"  
   
"Hakuna Matata," Xander repeated.  
   
Her frown deepened.         
   
He rolled his eyes before he decided to explain.  
   
 **Xander:** _Hakuna Matata!_  
 _What a wonderful phrase_  
 _Hakuna Matata!_  
 _Ain't no passing craze_  
 _It means no worries_  
 _For the rest of your days_  
 _It's my problem-free_  
 _Philosophy_  
 _Hakuna Matata!_  
 _  
_"Hakuna matata?"  
  
"Yeah, it's my motto."  
  
"Since when you had a motto?"  
   
"Since I've stuffed pudding in Mr. Lawrence's pants. I'm telling ya, Will, these two words will solve all your problems."  
  
 **Xander:** _Hakuna Matata!_  
 _What a wonderful phrase_  
 _Hakuna Matata!_  
 _Ain't no passing craze_  
 _  
_ **Willow with excitement:** _It means no worries_  
 _For the rest of your days_  
  
 **Xander:** _Yeah, sing it, Will!_  
  
 **Xander and Willow** _ **:** It's our problem-free_  
 _Philosophy..._  
 _Hakuna Matata!_  
   
Willow grinned. "I think I'll have me some of these Bugles." She looked at the screen. "Maybe we should rewind. I wanna see when Erma calls herself Dona."

 

 

 

~*~*~*~

 

 

 

** Episode: ** Entropy   
** Song: ** [Kiss the Girl (The Little Mermaid)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TrRbB-qUJfY)

 

 

Dawn pouted when she saw Tara walking away from Willow at the Espresso Pump. She knew they were going to take it slow, but it had been months since the break up. Dawn couldn't be any more patient.  
   
She hurried toward Tara. "Hey, Tara!"  
   
Tara smiled. "Hey, Dawn."  
   
"Why aren't you two leaving together?" Dawn asked straight away.  
   
Tara raised an eyebrow. "Were you spying on us?"  
   
"Whatev." Dawn waved the accusation away. "The important thing is you and Willow. You have to be a couple again."  
   
Tara had a strict expression on her face. "That thing is for me and Willow to decide."  
   
"But…" Dawn looked over the Espresso Pump. "Why is Willow still sitting there?"  
   
Tara looked back at Willow, who was reading a large textbook. "She wants to study over another Latte."  
   
"But she's all alone," Dawn said in the best sympathetic voice she could muster.  
   
Tara shrugged. "Well, I had to leave."  
   
"Did you kiss?"  
   
"Dawn!"  
   
"You didn't!"  
   
Tara twisted her lips. "Dawn, I told you."  
   
"Whatever." She grabbed Tara and they were cheek to cheek looking at Willow.  
   
 **Dawn:** _There is Willow_  
 _Sitting there in the Espresso_  
 _She doesn’t have a say in this_  
 _And the answer is with a kiss_  
 _It's your move to make_  
 _This is your chance to take_  
 _You gotta kiss the girl_  
   
"Dawn!" Tara protested. Dawn still held on to Tara's head.  
  
 **Dawn:** _Yes, you want her_  
 _Look at her, you know you do_  
 _Without doubt she wants you too_  
 _There is one way to ask her_  
 _It doesn’t take a word_  
 _Not a single word_  
 _Go on and kiss the girl_  
  
Dawn stepped aside for Tara to make her move. But when Tara remained standing, Dawn's face fell with disappointment.  
   
 **Dawn:** _Sha la la la la la_  
 _My oh my_  
 _Looks like Tara is too shy_  
 _Ain't gonna kiss the girl_  
 _Sha la la la la la_  
 _Ain't that sad?_  
 _Ain't it a shame?_  
 _Too bad, you gonna miss the girl_  
   
"That's enough, Dawn!" Tara reproached and walked away.  
   
Dawn huffed, knowing that Tara was possibly fighting the urge to glance back at Willow.  
  


 

 

 

  
~*~*~*~  
   
   


 

 

** Episode: ** Entropy   
** Song: ** [Out of Thin Air (Aladdin 3)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YWdEw8fCa1w)

 

 

 

 

 

"Tara?" Willow gasped with surprise when Tara came into her room unannounced. The shocking events of tonight seemed to never stop coming. The nerds had set spying cameras in every place possible for Scooby hang outs, Spike and Anya slept together, Buffy looked extremely hurt for some reason, Xander took an axe and marched towards the Magic Box, and now Tara was standing right in front of her.  
   
"You can't ever…" Tara sighed, "Put them back the way they were."  
  
"Are you okay?"  
  
"I'm sorry, it's just…" Tara took a deep breath, "You know, it takes time." She walked into the room. "You can't just ... have coffee and expect…"  
  
Willow looked down, ashamed. "I know."  
   
Long seconds passed between the two of them. Willow didn't know what to say or how to make it better for Tara. She didn't want to ruin it after they had gone a long road to recover their battered relationship. So they just stuck to silence with Willow sitting and Tara standing with a considerable distance separating them.  
   
Tara opened her mouth deciding to end the silence. "There's just so much to work through. Trust has to be built again, on both sides ..." Willow looked sadly at Tara, not wanting things to go long and slow before she could have Tara in her arms. "You have to learn if ... if we're even the same people we were, if you can fit in each other's lives."  
   
Willow continued looking at Tara, unhappily.  
   
"It's a long... important process, and ... can we just skip it? Can-can you just be kissing me now?"  
   
Willow looked hopeful, then delighted as the words sunk in. Tara wanted her back, right now. She smiled widely and jumped up.  
   
Then stopped.  
   
She looked uncertain at Tara. She didn't want to screw this up, what if Tara didn't mean what she said?  
   
Tara looked at her questionably.  
   
"Are you sure you want this?" Willow whispered.  
   
Tara smiled with teary eyes.  
   
 **Tara:** _You showed me the world_  
 _When I was all locked up inside,_  
 _You reached out your hand_  
 _And took me on a magic broom ride_  
 _One look at your smile,_  
 _And I could see the light_  
 _Shining everywhere_  
 _I just wanna skip it all and kiss you now._  
   
Willow approached.  
   
 **Willow:** _Oh, Tara_  
 _You don't understand_  
 _There is so much that you don't see_  
 _Just think, if you can,_  
 _What giving magic up had to be like for me_  
 _I know you're not a fan_  
 _Of careless power-holic Willow_  
 _I know I'm not as well_  
 _So how can you say you just wanna kiss me now?_  
 _  
_Willow looked elsewhere shamefully.  
  
 **Willow:** _I've screwed up a lot_  
   
Tara approached and held her hand.  
   
 **Tara:** _You've got the chance to learn_  
  
Willow looking at her: _Are you sure you want me now?_  
  
 **Tara:** _I'll be with you, help you get through..._  
 _I just can not wait_    
  
 **Willow holding Tara's hands:** _I love you_  
  
 **Tara:** _For the long process to take its turn_  
  
 **Willow:** _I've waited so long_  
  
 **Tara:** _And wouldn’t it be great_  
 _To help each other instead of going apart_  
  
 **Willow:** _Maybe you're right_  
  
"So would you be kissing me now?" Tara asked hopefully.  
   
Willow smiled, then smacked her lips on Tara's and they kissed passionately.  
   
 

 

 

  
~*~*~*~  
 

 

 

  
   
 **Episode:** Seeing Red  
 **Song:** [A Whole New World (Aladdin)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dw3Yc0DGye8)

 

 

 

Tara emerged from Willow's bedroom with the sheet wrapped around her. Her eyes fell on Dawn, whose face lit up. Tara held on to the sheets, feeling mildly embarrassed. "Oh. Hey."  
  
"Oh! You and…"  
  
Tara smiled. "Uh, that's my cue to put some clothes on." She turned back toward the bedroom.  
  
"No! No no no!" Dawn shouted. "I'm totally not here! You guys, you do whatever you want. Um ... I'll go watch TV. Downstairs, really loud! In the basement. Where I can't hear anything. Oh my god!"  
  
Dawn rushed off giggling excitedly. Tara and Willow grinned at each other, and headed back toward the bedroom. Dawn reappeared almost immediately.  
  
"I love you, guys!" she squealed then disappeared again.  
  
Willow smiled at Tara and then closed the bedroom door the second they were inside. Tara let the sheets fall to the floor and smiled back at Willow.  
  
 **Willow:** _A whole new world_  
  
 **Tara:** _A whole new life_

 **Both:** _For you and me_  
   
Then they kissed.


	3. The Vengeance Demon of Sweden

 

 

** Episode: ** Post- Fear Itself

** Song: ** [Strangers Like Me (Tarzan)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FaIbELk8Tzg)

 

 

So there she was, a human, a fragile mortal stuck in a fragile body. Not for eternity, no, there was no eternity for humans, but she would have to grow old and wrinkly and, she shuddered, _die._  
   
Death, such a final word, something she never bothered with in her days as a vengeance demon. Now she had to fear it, watch out for it, if she were stuck in that frat house with Xander and his friends, she would definitely be dead, because that, bunnies withstanding, was her ultimate fear now.  
   
“Never took James Bond for a furry. Unless it’s a playboy mansion bunny,” Xander muttered between passionate kissing, his hands caressing her costume.  
   
Ah, yes, Xander. Her new flame. After all the fame and glory, now she was shacking up with some eighteen-year-old _male_ child. Halfrek would be laughing her ass off.  
   
“What’s up?” he asked with a crooked smile. He was a cute eighteen-year-old male child. So what of it? She was stuck in a cute eighteen-year-old female body. Better make the most of it.   
   
So she kissed him. Fervently.  
   
“Maybe we should move this sexy action to bed?” he suggested seductively, and it filled her stomach with butterflies. Who was she kidding? She wanted him, desired him with every fiber she had.  
   
One item of clothing flying away after another until they were naked. Their bodies were comparable, same age bodily even though Anya was older, centuries older. She knew more than this mortal child, yet somehow when out in the mortal world, he seemed more experienced. Like tonight when they were among his friends.      
   
“Xander,” she said, breathing down his neck, “Why did your friends stare at me when I made that very logical comment about Giles?”  
   
His lips stopped sucking on her earlobe. “Oh, um, that. It was… kinda inappropriate.”  
   
“Not to me. Why?”  
   
He pushed her gently away to look her in the eyes. “Anya, you made him feel uncomfortable. Giles is our older friend.”  
   
“Why doesn’t he socialize with older friends his age?”  
   
“Because he doesn’t have any. As far as I know. And… we need him. He’s smart and knows his way around a pile of dusty books.”   
   
“So, you keep him around for his extensive knowledge of demonology and Slayer combat.” That made sense. He used to be Buffy’s watcher. He’s more knowledgeable and wiser than the children he associated with.  
   
“No, we keep him around because he’s our friend. And please, stop talking his age in front of him again.” He sounded too defensive and frustrated, which left Anya extremely puzzled.   
   
“Why?”  
   
“Because… God, Anya, it’s no rocket science!” Now his voice was rising and his nostrils flared. “You obviously know why.”  
   
“I don’t.”  
   
He stared at her, his lowered brows eased up slightly. “Maybe… because you were a demon for so long. You started to forget… social cues.”  
   
“Yeah, like when your father yelled at you just now for no apparent reason.”  
   
He bit his lower lips. “Right. No, I didn’t give him this month’s rent.”  
   
She raised an eyebrow. “So, give it to him.”  
   
“I need to find a real job first. Organizing Giles’ books doesn’t pay much.”  
   
“So find a job.” Now she felt frustrated. Why did humans like to complicate things? “I don’t get what the big deal is. Like how excited you got when Willow gave you her container of colorful buttons that you put over there, next to that device with the various shaped and colored buttons.”  
   
He followed her line of sight and a laugh escaped his mouth. “Those, my dear lady, are called M&M’s.” He fetched the container and offered her some. “Try one.”  
   
She took a red button and popped it into her mouth. “Chocolate.”  
   
Xander held up the other odd object and waved it in her face. “And this is the remote control. It turns the TV on and off and many other things. You’ve never seen one before?”  
   
“Been a demon for centuries. I had no use for human creations.” She stared at the remote control. “But you’ll teach me how to use it.”  
   
“Sure, when you press…”  
   
“Xander, after sex.”  
   
“Right.”  
   
   
   
~*~*~*~*~  
   
   
   
She breathed a satisfied sigh, pressing her head on Xander’s chest. Large arms wrapped around her and held her tightly. It should be perfect, but a nagging thought kept troubling her mind.  
   
“Xander?”  
   
He hummed, his hand stroking her hair.  
   
“When I interrupted Buffy’s boring story, the others gave me infatuating looks.”  
   
He sighed. “Because it was rude, Ahn.”  
   
“No, it wasn’t. She was talking about an ancient vase her mother bought.”  
   
“Still, when someone’s talking we should listen to them out of respect.”  
   
She rolled her eyes. “I’ll tell you who’s not getting respect, me. I was feared everywhere around the world, and now…I’m a human,” the last word rolled out of her mouth like a curse.  
   
“Being a human is not so bad.” His gentle hand was fondling her hair again.   
   
“The sex’s great.”  
   
“Also, having friends you can count on.” His other hand pressed her against him for emphasis.  
   
“Your friends hate me.”  
   
“They don’t hate you.”  
   
Anya scoffed.  
   
“Look you just… you just need to learn the human ways of interaction. There are books on that.”  
   
She raised herself up and looked at him. “What about you?”  
   
“Me?” His beautiful thick eyebrows rose up in shock.  
   
“You have tremendous social skills.”  
   
He burst into a fit of laughter, then stopped abruptly when she didn’t join him. “You’re not joking?”  
   
She beamed from ear to ear, nuzzling his chest with her nose then biting his nipple. “Would you teach me?”  
   
“Ye… yes!” He gasped, but didn’t stop her. She loved how he reacted to her torturing his sensitive nipples.  
   
Next day was Anya’s first lesson on human behavior, which included making refreshments for his lazy friends. It wasn’t a hard task, Giles’ kitchen was neatly organized.  
   
Xander brought two glasses of freshly squeezed orange juice to Buffy and Willow, who thanked him with bright smiles. Anya brought a glass to Giles, but he was too absorbed on the book he was reading. She stood there like an idiot waiting for him to notice her. She looked up at Xander in frustration. He wordlessly suggested poking Giles. She did just that, but then Giles jumped and his head knocked the glass out of her grip and it crashed down on the floor.  
   
“Have you lost your mind?” she snapped at him. “That’s two juicy oranges wasted on the…”  
   
She stopped when she noticed Xander fiercely shaking his head.  
   
“Sorry for my disrespectful outburst,” she said politely. “I’m going to get you a broom and a paper towel to clean up your mess.” She winked at Xander.  
   
Xander ducked his head when Buffy and Willow stifled their giggles.  
   
 **Anya:** _Whatever you do, I'll do it too_  
 _Show me everything and tell me how_  
 _It all means something_  
 _And yet nothing to me_  
 _  
_ _I can see there's so much to learn_  
 _It's all so close and yet so far_  
 _I see myself as people see me_  
 _Oh, I just know there's something bigger out there_  
 _  
_ _I wanna know, can you show me_  
 _I wanna be a regular human like you_  
 _Tell me more, please show me_  
 _Something's familiar about these traditions you do_  
  
Anya’s human communication skills were very successful that night. She had rehearsed well at home to surprise Xander and she certainly did. He kept winking at her when she gave Buffy her best heartfelt condolence over her Parker drama and when she pretended to be very interested on Oz’s whereabouts. She even nodded to show her fake interest when Willow supplied that he was in a band practice. She didn’t appreciate Willow’s pouty silence right after. Xander should give her tips to boost up her social skills.  
   
“Did you like when I complemented Giles on his ugly clothing?” Anya skipped happily on the way back to Xander’s house.  
   
“If the word ‘ugly’ didn’t slip in, I’d have given it an A plus.”  
   
“I’m stoked!” she exclaimed. “Can’t wait to ace the next meeting.”  
   
Xander grinned down at her. He had a beautiful smile. She couldn’t wait until they were in his smelly basement for new rounds of intercourse.  
   
His hand clasped hers and squeezed. A small gesture like that sent her flying. The butterflies were back. She was falling for a human boy and right then it felt okay.  
   
 **Anya:** _Every gesture, every move that he makes_  
 _Makes me feel like never before_  
 _Why do I have_  
 _This growing need to be beside him_  
 _  
_ _Ooo, these emotions I never knew_

_Of some other world far beyond this place  
Beyond the trees, above the clouds  
I see before me a new horizon   
  
I wanna know, can you show me  
I wanna be a regular human like you_

_Tell me more, please show me  
Something's familiar about these traditions you do_

~*~*~*~

 

 

 

** Episode: ** Post- Doublemeat Palace

** Song: ** [Reflection (Mulan)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zzHR0IErM60)

  

   
"I just don't see what is it that I did that made you go all Grumpy!" Xander complained again.  
   
They were back in _his_ apartment, Anya was sure he would remind her of that fact once he got the chance. Anya was mad at him and he knew it, yet he left the questions and answers 'till they got home. There was no need to put a show in front of his friends because, of course, their opinion on Xander's life mattered more than Anya's. Halfrek opened her eyes to the problems existing in her relationship with Xander.  
   
"Now he's implying I'm an elf," she mumbled, irritated. "I was silent for a long time, but now I see things clearly."  
   
Xander sighed. "What is it that you see clearly?"  
   
"You don't like who I am!"  
   
"Who you… what?"  
   
"You criticize me all the damn time. You think I'm silly and stupid and I need to be corrected." She was pacing in the apartment before she stopped, pointing an accusing finger at him. "And you never pick my side."  
   
"What? I always pick your side!"  
   
"Really, how about that time when you picked Willow's side while we were having our extensive Cataracts debate?"  
   
"But Vitamin C does prevent the formation of Cataracts." He frowned. "Or so I hear."     
   
"From Willow, I assume," she gritted out. "You always side with her instead of me. Always listen to what…"  
   
"That's not true!" he exclaimed, angry. "If I listened to her, I wouldn't have…" he trailed off, his eyes wide. He didn't need to continue. She knew what he wanted to say.  
   
"You wouldn't what? Be with me?" her voice trembled with anger. "Tell me, Xander, tell me that your friends don't even like me the slightest."  
   
"Hey, it's not like your scary demon friend likes me either," Xander pointed out with a glare. "And I know this whole fight is all her fault."  
   
"My demon friend, what about my _demon_ friend, Xander?" She crossed her arms and approached him. "She's a horrible, ugly demon, is that it?" She was face to face with him and she could see how uncomfortable he was getting. "She's not worth love or attention."  
   
"Clearly whatever I say I'll end up making the argument worse anyway," Xander said with a nervous expression.  
   
"Then you better shut up!" Anya yelled and stormed out of the apartment. Xander's voice followed her as she walked to the stairs, not bothering to use the elevator. She kept pacing into the darkness of the night, cursing Xander with every step. Nothing stopped her but the glass of the closed Magic Box. The light of the street enabled her to see her faint expression reflected on the glass.  
   
 **Anya:** _Look at me,_  
 _You may think you see who I really am_  
 _but you'll never know me_  
 _everyday, it’s as if I play a part_  
  
She softly touched her sad reflection on the glass.  
   
 **Anya:** _Now I see, if I wear a mask_  
 _I can fool the world_  
 _But I cannot fool my heart_  
  
She frowned at the pathetic girl reflected before her.  
   
 **Anya:** _Who is that girl I see,_  
 _Staring straight back at me._  
 _When will my reflection show_  
 _Who I am inside._  
  
Anya started to wander around aimlessly. Her arms crossed around her chest.  
   
 **Anya** : _I am now,_  
 _in a world where I have to hide my heart,_  
 _and what I believe in._  
 _But somehow I will show the world,_  
 _what's inside my heart,_  
 _and be loved for who I am._  
  
Looking down at her reflection in the puddle, Anya thought of stomping a foot at the tear lines reflected on her weathering cheeks.  
   
 **Anya:** _Who is that girl I see,_  
 _staring straight back at me._  
 _Why is my reflection show someone I don't know,_  
 _must I pretend that I'm,_  
 _someone else for all time,_  
 _when will my reflection show who I am inside._  
   
When she looked up, she was relieved to witness a bar two blocks away.  
   
   
   
   
~*~*~*~  
   
   
 **Song:** [Forget About Love (Aladdin 2)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=owzFmGjd0Qs)

 

 

 

"Gimme a beer," Anya demanded, sitting on a stool chair at the bar.    
   
"Didn't think I'd see you here," Spike’s amused voice drifted to her ears. She found him sitting next to her. "Where's Weepy Boy? Thought you two were inseparable." He took a gulp of his drink.  
   
"We had a fight," Anya mumbled, moving her finger in circles on the shiny bar.  
   
"Yeah? Seems all lovers fight tonight," Spike said bitterly.  
   
She looked at him with confusion. He hissed in alarm, and then hastily nodded his chin at a fighting couple on a table close by.  
   
Anya's shoulders fell in despair. "Yeah."  
   
Spike slammed his glass on the bar severely. "We don’t need their love."  
   
Anya frowned. "We?"  
   
"I mean you," Spike amended. "You don't need his rotten love. Better move on, I say."  
   
Anya gave him a look. "It's just a fight."  
   
"That what he wants you to think," Spike retorted. "I know how it goes. Thinks less of you 'cause of who you are." There was so much resentment there but Anya didn't care to dwell on it. She cared about the words he said, which spoke so much truth. Xander and the others were judging her for her past, which she was not ashamed of. She did what she thought was right, but Xander would never understand that about her.  
   
"Better forget about it all, before it's too late," Spike said. "Only brings you pain."  
   
"Forget about Xander?" Anya questioned uneasily.  
   
"Yeah, forget about bloody Xander," Spike stressed with enthusiasm. He held her chin and turned her face towards his.  
   
 **Spike:** _Forget about that bloke_  
 _Forget about the way you fell into his eyes_  
 _Forget about his charms_  
 _Forget about the way he held you in his arms_  
  
Anya slapped his hand away just as the bartender handed her a glass of beer. She wanted to take a sip but Spike suddenly singing in her ear startled her and she took a big swallow.   
   
 **Spike:** _Walking on air's obnoxious_  
 _The thrill_  
 _The chill_  
 _Will make you nauseous_  
 _  
_Anya glared at Spike and gestured for him to shut up. She went back to her glass.  
  
 **Spike:** _And you'll never get enough_  
 _Just forget about love!_  
  
Anya pushed the glass away and walked out of the bar. She couldn't believe that Spike was actually following her while singing. The words of his song were making her miss Xander more than wanting to resent him. Anyway, she wasn't that pathetic to return to Xander's apartment. Tonight, she was sleeping at hers.  
   
 **Spike:** _Forget about romance_  
 _Forget about the way your heart begins to dance_  
 _Then you feel the blush_  
 _When he's spouting out some sentimental mush_  
  
 _Love really is revolting!_ (Anya nodded in agreement with Spike.)  
 _It's even worse than when you're moulting_  
  
Anya stopped short at the sight before her. Xander was standing by the door to her building, a few flowers in his hand. The same flowers in the little vase in his living room, the ones she had arranged herself. He was leaning against the wall, looking sad and pathetic.  
   
Spike stood next to her and whispered in her ear.  
   
 **Spike:** _Enough of this fluff_  
 _Just forget about love_  
  
Her heart was beating faster now and tears filled her eyes. She was really touched by Xander's sweet gesture.  
  
 **Anya:** _I had almost forgotten the way it felt_  
 _When he said he loved all of me_  
 _My heart all a-flutter_  
  
 **Spike (disgusted):** _Oh, how I shudder_  
  
 **Anya:** _The first time we kissed_  
  
 **Spike:** _It won't be missed!_  
 _Forget about his touch_  
  
 **Anya:** _I can't forget about his touch_  
  
 **Spike:** _In the scheme of things,_  
 _It doesn't matter much_  
  
 **Anya:**   _It matters so much_  
  
 **Spike:** _You're better on your own_  
 _A meal becomes a banquet_  
 _When you eat alone_  
  
Anya looked at the resenting Spike.  
  
 **Anya:** _Hmm-mm-mm-mm_  
  
 **Both:** _Love's filled with compromises_  
  
Anya started walking toward Xander when Spike grabbed her hand and spun her around to face him.  
   
 **Spike:** _And don't you hate those big surprises?_  
  
Anya titled her head sweetly to appeal the idea of love to him.  
   
 **Anya:** _A cozy rendezvous_  
  
 **Spike scoffed:** _Oh, shudder!_  
  
 **Anya fluttered her eyelashes** : _Candlelight for two_  
  
 **Spike:** _Oh, bugger!_  
  
 **Anya rolled her eyes:** _Look you're calling my bluff!_  
  
She looked at Xander affectionately.  
   
 **Anya:** _I can't forget about love_  
  
Xander noticed her approaching him and almost dropped the flowers in his hand. "Anya, look, whatever got you upset with me, I'm willing to work it…"  
   
Anya placed a finger on his lips to shut him up. She looked up into his hazel eyes.  
  
 **Anya:** _I can't forget about my heart_  
  
Xander handed her the flowers.  
   
 **Xander:** _I can't forget about my heart_  
  
Anya gazed lovingly at the flowers.  
  
 **Anya:** _And how it felt_  
 _To fall for you right from the start_  
  
 **Xander:** _I'm still falling_  
  
 **Anya looked up:** _Whatever we may do_  
  
 **Xander:** _Whatever we may do_  
  
 **Anya:** _You are here for me,_  
 _And I'll be there for you_  
  
 **Xander:** _I'll be there_  
   
He picked her up and spun her around, the flowers in her hands flying in the air.    
  
 **Both:** _To wish, to want, to wander_  
 _To find the sun_  
 _Through rain and thunder_  
  
Xander put her down and then they started to walk home, to Xander's apartment.  
  
 **Xander:** _A cozy rendezvous_  
  
 **Anya:** _That’s swell!_  
  
 **Xander:** _Candlelight for two_  
   
Spike stepped on a forgotten flower on the ground.   
  
 **Spike:** _Oh, bleeding hell,_  
 _Enough is enough!_  
  
 **Xander and Anya:** _We can't forget about love!_  
   
Spike lit a cigarette watching the happy couple disappearing into the night. He gazed down at the damaged petals peeking out from under his dirty boot. How he envied them.  
   
   
   
~*~*~*~  
   
   
 **Episode:** Hell's Bells  
 **Song:** [There's A Party Here in Agrabah (Aladdin 3)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jO-w6kKDpes)

 

 

  
Dawn danced happily in her hideous green bride's maid dress around the flowers in the main hall. She smelled one of the red roses with a delightful expression on her face.

 **Dawn:** _There's a party here in Sunnydale,  
There's excitement in the air  
People pouring in from near and far  
'Cause Xander and Anya are gonna have a "waddin'"_  
  
Dawn walked to the entrance to greet the arriving guests from Xander's drunken family and Anya's demon family.

 **Dawn:** _There's a party here in Sunnydale,  
Everybody will be there  
We'll make sure it won't be a fail  
We do that because we care_  
  
Dawn greeted Xander's parents with a happy beam. Xander's mom gave her a timid smile. Xander's dad eyed the bar with interest.

 **Dawn:** _Xander's gettin' married, and it's gonna be  
The wedding of the century  
My friend's gettin' married, and you're gonna see  
Just how much I can do!  
_  
Willow eyed Tara from behind a big vase. When Tara turned around in suspicion, Willow hid again.

 **Willow:** _There's a party here in Sunnydale,  
And it's got a color glow  
If Xander could've come so far,  
Maybe I could do it  
Sure, there's nothin' to it!_ (She took another glance at Tara.)  
  
 **Xander's Parents:** _There's a party here in Sunnydale,  
But we weren't sure that we'd go  
For although it's our son's happy day,  
The bride is awfully low_  
  
Dawn gestured to the guests to walk inside.

 **Dawn:** _And now we take you down to the hall  
Where everyone has celebrated all night long  
Without Warren, Jonathan and I'm guessing Paul  
Everybody's happy  
What could possibly go wrong?_   
  
Under the rain, down the street, walked a suspicious old man.

 **Old Man:** _There's a party here in Sunnydale  
And I'm going to ruin it all  
_ _For Anyanka has to pay the price_ _  
_ _Of her evil call_ _  
_ _and vengeance thrall_   _  
_

Spike walked inside with his date. He searched around for Buffy and pulled the girl closer.

 **Spike:** _There's a party here in Sunnydale  
Can't believe they let me in_

His date was more interested in the wedding gifts resting on a nearby big table.

 **Date:** _I like this wedding stuff so far!  
Maybe if I'm pleasant,  
I'll get to keep a present!_  
  
Clem looked around, impressed. He caught up with Buffy and congratulated her.

 **Clem:** _There's a party here in Sunnydale  
Yes, they're filling up the room  
But there's something missing… yes...ah hah!_  
  
 **Buffy looked horrified:**   _Where is the groom?_

 

 

 

~*~*~*~

 

 

 

Buffy and Dawn found Xander sitting in the groom room, still not fully dressed. Dawn almost panicked. "Somebody's gonna be late for his own wedding!"  
   
Xander smiled bitterly at a small picture in his hands. Buffy glanced at it. It was a picture of a little Xander and his parents, all grim faces, no one was smiling. She touched Xander's shoulder gently for support.  
   
"Xander," Dawn whined. "You gotta move it. We can't start without you?"  
   
"I was just thinking…" he began. "I've never seen a happy marriage in my whole life." He pointed at the detached married couple in the picture. "These guys are probably the worst example of a marriage."  
   
"Everything will be fine," Buffy assured. "After all, I'll make sure they'll be banned from the bar."  
   
Xander chuckled.  
   
"Xander," Dawn whined again.  
   
"All right, all right." He stood up and looked at his reflection at the mirror. He looked at Buffy and Dawn with a huge goofy grin.  
   
 **Xander:** _There's a party here in Sunnydale_  
 _And the party's all for me_  
 _Just look, you guys, at where we are,_  
 _And how our dreams have come to be!_  
  
Willow and Tara were helping Anya with her wedding dress as she sang.  
  
 **Anya:** _There's a party here in Sunnydale_  
 _And I can't believe it's true_  
 _After all this waiting, here we are_  
 _We'll finally get so say "I do!"_  
  
Xander looked again at the miserable picture.  
  
 **Xander:** _I never, ever had a real family_  
  
 **Anya:** _I never, ever had a real true friend_  
  
 **Both:** _Someone who could just understand me..._  
  
Dawn snatched the picture from Xander's hands.  
  
 **Dawn:** _Hey, c'mon, Xander, this stalling has gotta end!_  
  
 **Buffy:** _There's a party here in Sunnydale_  
 _And it's starting right away_  
 _Let's getcha dressed, 'cause you're the star!_  
 _Hey, c'mon, it's your wedding day!_  
  
 **Xander's mother:** _Xander's gettin' married, hope it's gonna be_  
 _The wedding of the century_  
  
 **Xander's dad:** _Weird how Xander could've come so far..._  
  
Dawn ran down the halls.  
  
 **Dawn:** _They're finally gettin' married_  
  
 **Willow:** _They're finally gettin' married_  
  
 **Tara:** _They're finally gettin' married_  
  
Date tugged on Spike's arm and pointed.  
  
 **Date:** _Look at all these presents!_  
  
 **Anya:** _We're finally getting married_  
  
Buffy helped tie Xander's tie.  
  
 **Buffy:** (Smiling at Xander) _you're finally gettin' married_  
  
 **Xander:** (Smiling at Buffy) _I'm finally gettin' married!_  
  
 **Guests:** _They're finally gettin' married!_  
 _At the party in Sunnydale!_  
 _Such a sight to see_  
 _Come on, go with me_  
 _To the party in Sunnydale!_  
   
A small child grinned at Old Man. "They're getting married," she giggled, then ran to her mom.  
   
Old Man grimaced. "No, they won’t."  
   
 

  
   
~*~*~*~  
 

  
   
 **Song:** [Reflection (Mulan)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zzHR0IErM60)

 

 

 

 

Anya couldn't look up in the dark demon realm. Her tears weren't dry yet, but she was tired of crying. She was still wearing her wedding gown but not the veil. Why did he do this to her? Didn't he love her? He told her he loved all of her, was that a lie? Why did he leave her at the happiest day of her life?  
   
D'hoffryn sighed behind her. "Oh, Anyanka. I'm sorry. But you let him domesticate you. When you were a vengeance demon, you were powerful, at the top of your game. You crushed men like him."  
   
Anya's lips fluttered.  
   
 **Anya:** _There's a heart that must_  
 _Be free to fly_  
 _That burns with a need_  
 _To know the reason why_  
 _Why must we all conceal_  
 _What we think_  
 _How we feel_  
 _Must there be a secret me_  
 _I’m forced to hide?_  
   
"It's time you got back to what you do best ... don't you think?"  D'hoffryn asked.  
   
Anya finally lifted her face up to look at him. Her expression was blank.  
   
 **Anya:** _I won’t pretend that I'm_  
 _Someone else_  
 _For all time_  
 _When will my reflection show_  
 _Who I am inside?_  
   
She looked at her wedding ring with hate.  
   
 **Anya:** _When will my reflection show_  
 _who I am inside?_


	4. Beauty and the Vampire

 

 

 

** Episode: ** Post-Blood Ties   
** Song: ** [Part of Your World (The Little Mermaid)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xGlzrobQs5M)

 

 

 

Nest of vampires. Slayer upped her game. All alone without the back up of her Scooby club. Taking on one vampire after the other. Whole fight must be child’s play.  
   
Spike watched her with admiration, a cigarette dangling from his lips.  
   
She appeared vicious, relentless, almost as if she was blowing off some steam. Little Sis discovering her roots must still bite. And as usual she blamed it on Spike. Every mistake she made it was on his neck. How the hell would he know that little mumming moppet was a mystical key a god was in the hunt for? No one told him a thing. He was a monster after all. Not human. Wasn’t invited to her birthday party. Wasn’t allowed near her family and friend. Just because he was allergic to the sun.  
   
If only…  
   
Bollocks, shouldn’t even go there. That was Angel’s song. Spike didn’t want to become human. Not even for her. He didn’t care for strolls on the beach under the sun. Not his style.  
   
Three vampires combusted to dust with one move in three seconds, and it just made him want her more.  
   
If only she’d let him touch her. Be part of her life. They could still do beach strolls. He’d steal a thicker blanket, put on sunglasses, maybe cover himself in sunscreen. Whatever it took to be with her.  
   
More vampires showed up. She looked exhausted. The fire wasn’t there anymore. Spike growled when a vampire smashed her head on a tombstone.  
   
He jumped out of hiding and snatched the neglected stake hidden between the grass. He finished the job for her in minutes.    
   
She was momentarily unconscious, her steady heartbeats starting to drum faster. He knelt next to her and held her warm hand, gazing into her beautiful face.  
   
 **Spike:** _What would I give to live where you are?_  
 _What would I pay to stay here beside you?_  
 _What would I do to see you_  
 _Smiling at me?_  
 _Where would we walk_  
 _Where would we run_  
 _If we could stay all day in the sun?_  
 _Just you and me_  
 _And I could be_  
 _Part of your world_  
   
Her eyelids flickered. She would see that he saved her, that he had changed, that he was worthy of her love.  
   
“Buffy!”  
   
Spike cursed under his breath when he heard Giles shouting. He put down her hand and disappeared into the shadows where he belonged.  
   
   
   
~*~*~*~*~  
   
   
 **Song:** [Part of Your World (The Little Mermaid)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t6Ol7VsZGk4)  
   
  
   
   
He walked back to his crypt in dismay, another night, another failure. Seeing her every night out there was getting harder. He couldn’t stay away. He wanted her. All of her.  
   
He drew back the curtain in the corner of his cavern within the crypt. There in the alcove was his heaven. Buffy, surrounding him, her scent, her face, all around him. He placed the new stake next to the old ones on the table covered with her photos.     
   
 **Spike** : _Look at this stuff_  
 _Isn't it neat?_  
 _Wouldn't you think my collection's complete?_  
 _Wouldn't you think I'm the man_  
 _The man who has everything?_  
   
He looked over his Buffy souvenirs, touching her face in a photo stuck to the wall.  
  
 **Spike:** _Look at this trove_  
 _Treasures untold_  
 _How many wonders can one alcove hold?_  
 _Looking around here you'd think_  
 _Sure_  
 _He’s got everything_  
 _  
_ _I've got photos and drawings of plenty_  
 _I've got sweaters and knickers galore_  
 _You want some of her stakes?_  
 _I got twenty_  
 _But who cares?_  
 _No big deal_  
 _I want more_  
  
He walked over to the mannequin and twirled the blonde locks on its wig. His treasures were mere items, the only tangible things of her he would ever have. But they were not the real deal. They were not _Buffy_.  
   
 **Spike:** _I wanna be part of her life_  
 _I wanna see, her eyes dancing at the sight of me_  
 _Instead she keeps calling me —what did she call me?—oh, a troll._  
 _  
_ _Riley had it better, he was in her life_  
 _Perfect type to meet her mother and family_  
 _Only thing going for him was the—what's that word again?– soul._ (He scoffs)  
  
 _Out where she walks_  
 _Out where she runs_  
 _Out where she slays using crossbows and puns_  
 _So hear my plea_  
 _Wish I could be_  
 _Part of her world_  
  
His fist tightened on the fake blonde locks and he kicked the mannequin away. “This isn’t enough,” he muttered, staring at the Buffys in the pictures laughing down at him.  
   
“I’ll never be enough.” As the realization sank, he dragged the curtain closed.  
   
 

 

  
   
~*~*~*~*~  
 

 

  
   
 **Episode** : Post-Crush  
 **Song:** [Belle (Beauty and the Beast)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Oni8_k5twU)

 

 

The Magic Box’s bell jingled. Everybody watched Spike rushing inside, smoke rising from his burning brown blanket.  

"What do you want, Spike?" Xander spitted out.  
   
"Want to talk to Buffy," Spike panted, throwing the blanket away.  
   
"She's not here," Giles muttered.  
   
"Yes, she is. Saw her walking in."  
   
"Well, you saw wrong," Anya said quickly.  
   
"And how did you see her? Were you stalking her?" Willow accused.  
   
"In s-such a sunny day?" Tara asked, stunned.  
   
"I…" Spike wanted to defend himself but the words died in his mouth, especially when he noted Giles' deadly stare.  
   
"Get. Out," the watcher hissed.  
   
Spike pursed his lips in frustration, grabbed the burned blanket and walked out.  
   
"Is he gone?" Buffy's nervous voice drifted from the training room.  
   
"It's safe, Buff," Xander reassured.  
   
Buffy stormed out in a huff, this new Spike development was the last thing she needed right now. She and her mother were still walking on eggshells in front of Dawn, desperately showing her that she was real to them no matter what. A crazed god was after her sister, her mother was still recovering and trying to get back on the dating horse and there was a major drama exam on Monday. This Spike thing couldn’t have come at a worst time.    
   
Tara shook her head. "This wh-whole thing is creeping me out."  
   
"Good thing you're doing by ignoring him," Xander said with an approving nod. “He’ll get bored eventually and leave you alone.”  
   
"Why do all the men in my life have to be creepy?" Buffy complained.  
   
"I don't think Riley was. Angel wasn't either, except when he's leather pant-ed," Willow pointed.  
   
"One day you'll get a good guy, like Riley," Xander said. Buffy shot him a look. "One who doesn't leave, of course," he amended bashfully.  
   
Buffy sighed. "Can you imagine? Spike in love with me. _Me_ , in love with that soulless, disgusting…"  
  
 **Buffy:** _Buffy and Spike_  
 _Can't you just see it?_  
 _Buffy and Spike_  
 _Carve it with a knife_  
 _No sir! Not me!_  
 _I guarantee it_  
 _Can’t I just have a normal life_  
  
Her friends stared at her in sympathy. Giles walked over towards her with a book. “There. Research is my comfort food. Perhaps finding Glory’s weak spot will cheer you up.”  
   
“I’ll try anything.” Buffy snatched it from his hands and sat at the round table. The words didn’t make sense, mostly because she was too occupied by pathetic thoughts about her doomed love life.  
   
She caught the chaste kiss Xander planted on Anya’s lips as he followed Giles to the training room. She didn’t miss the way Willow and Tara’s fingers touched as they discussed a new spell they were trying. She wished she could be as happy as her friends one day. She thought she had what they had with Riley. Being a slayer meant early deaths and condemned relationships. Every passing day she realized she could never have the guy, the one, he who would love her for who she was and accept her regardless of her faults.  
   
 **Buffy (softly to herself)** : _I want someone who’s feisty and passionate_  
 _I want him kind and affectionate_  
 _And for once it might be grand_  
 _To have someone understand_  
 _I want someone who would love all of me_  
  
   
   
   
~*~*~*~  
   
 

  
   
 **Episode:** Flooded  
 **Song:** [One Day She'll Love Me (The Emperor's New Groove Sound Track)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=413q9PaxTCY)

 

 

 

They were sitting quietly on the steps of Buffy’s front porch. They didn't know what to say in additional to Spike's few clumsy suggestions to her flood problem. Still, they were okay with sitting silently and staring into the night, just letting their feelings inside speak for themselves.  
   
 **Inner Spike:** _I'd never imagined before_  
 _That the world could be turned on its head_  
 _I'd never have thought_  
 _To be here in this place_  
 _I'd never have dreamt that in love_  
 _I'd be lost and so easily led_  
 _I guess I was caught_  
 _By that hint of a smile on her face_  
  
He recalled that small smile he put on her face when he jokingly suggested offing her friends. She would have killed him if he’d made that joke last year. But now, back from the death, dug her way out of grave, she was his equal of sorts.   
 _  
_ **Inner Spike:** _I thought I was happy_  
 _When all I wanted was for her to die_  
 _But that was the past_  
 _Of an ignorant vamp_  
 _I'm falling in love with the girl_  
 _But I'm forced to be living a lie_  
 _And she'd never love me_  
 _Not even under the glinting lamp_  
  
He looked at her and she looked back, and there it was again, that hint of a smile. As much as he hated the gits who caused her pain by ripping her out of heaven, he was thankful she was here. He was never closer to her than right now, right after she came back. She talked about her sorrows to no one but him, not her sister, not even the watcher. Could it be that now, finally, she was going to return his feelings?  
  
 **Inner Spike:** _Is it asking too much_  
 _If I pray for a miracle, miracle_  
 _That one day she'll love me_  
 _One day she'll say I care_  
  
Buffy turned away from Spike and sighed. She wasn't sure why she felt more comfortable with him than her own family. Giles was back and yet she couldn't talk to him. Was it because Spike was here when Giles wasn't? Or could it be because Spike was showing more understanding and devotion than he ever did before. But still… she couldn't… she wasn't…  
   
 **Inner Buffy:** _Although he's changing day by day_  
 _I find these tender words of love_  
 _Impossible to say_  
 _  
_ _He walks in the room_  
 _And I'm never quite sure_  
 _If he's trying to be somebody else_  
 _I'm liking him better that he's_  
 _Not his arrogant self_  
 _Perhaps I'm expecting too much_  
 _Of a miracle, miracle_  
 _  
_ _One day I won't need him_  
 _One day I'll only need them_ (She glanced at the window where Giles’ shadow was visible.)  
 _Just like I always did back in the day_  
  
Buffy looked up at a shiny star in the sky and sighed once more.  
   
 **Inner Buffy:** _Distant Star_  
 _Cast your light_  
 _On my life_  
  
Spike followed her gaze to the lonely shiny star.  
   
 **Inner Spike:** _And one by one_  
 _I didn't anticipate feeling the power of love_  
 _In this way_  
  
 **Together:** _And day by day_  
 _We've never been closer than this_  
 _And I find myself daring to pray_  
  
 **Inner Spike:** _We'll find these tender ways of love_  
 _Impossible to disobey_    
  
He looked back at Buffy.  
   
 **Inner Spike:** _One day she'll love me_  
  
Buffy looked at him as well.  
   
 **Inner Buffy:** _One day he'll leave me_  
 _And I will leave him_  
 _Until that happens_  
 _I'll stick by him_  
 _And he'll stick by me_

 

 

 

~*~*~*~*~

 

 

 

** Episode: ** Older and Far Away   
** Song: ** [Beauty and the Beast (Beauty and the Beast)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=36o6qtNtZM4)

 

 

 

 

   
Tara saw Spike smirk and walk up to Buffy in the foyer. He tried to take her hands but she pulled them away. "Stop it. Someone's gonna see."  
   
Buffy was smiling, so Tara knew it was mostly playful fun. Buffy tried to escape towards the kitchen but Spike stopped her at the doorway, putting one hand on the wall beside her head to block her way.  
   
"Hmmm." He put his other hand on her shoulder, ran it down her arm, took her hand and placed it on his thigh.  
   
Things were starting to heat up, and Tara wasn’t sure she should be watching. This was soon turning into straight folk version of porn, or initial porn. She knew Spike was putting his claim on her out of jealousy. Xander and Anya were setting up Buffy with Xander’s coworker Richard, which did not set well with Spike.    
   
She didn't expect the emotions reflected on Buffy's face when Spike started kissing her neck and how she seemed to yearn for more. Buffy and Spike, reviving the old stories of hate/love romance. It was like watching Xena and Aries.  
   
 **Tara:** _Tale as old as time_  
 _True as it can be_  
 _Barely even friends_  
 _Then somebody bends_  
 _Unexpectedly_  
 _Just a little change_  
 _Small to say the least_  
 _Both a little scared_  
 _Neither one prepared_  
 _Beauty and the Beast_  
  
Spike drew away from Buffy's neck and stared into her eyes. She stared back, the more pronounced want and desire didn’t hide the trace of deeper feelings reflected in her eyes. Tara could tell, they were there.  
  
 **Tara:** _Ever just the same_  
 _Ever a surprise_  
 _Ever as before_  
 _Ever just as sure_  
 _As the sun will rise_  
  
 _Tale as old as time_  
 _Tune as old as song_  
 _Bittersweet and strange_  
 _Finding you can change_  
 _Learning you were wrong_  
 _Certain as the sun_  
 _Rising in the east_  
 _Tale as old as time_  
 _Song as old as rhyme_  
 _Beauty and the Beast_  
  
Tara's eyes softened when Buffy pulled Spike’s head gently, drawing him into a soft yet passionate kiss.  
  
 **Tara:** _Tale as old as time_  
 _Song as old as rhyme_  
 _Beauty and the Beast_  
   
Suddenly, Tara heard Willow's voice from the kitchen. "Okay, it's just a beer run, I'll go."  
   
Tara had to act fast. She burst from the end of the hall toward the two love birds. Buffy quickly pulled away, throwing a glare at Spike and walked off.    
   
Tara stared at an uncomfortable Spike.  
   
“I, uh, had a muscle cramp. Buffy was... helping.”  
   
Yeah, right.

 

  
  
~*~*~*~

 

 

 **Episode:** Seeing Red  
 **Song:** [I Will Go the Distance (Hercules)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XjMBJfwwEEk)  
  
   
   
"Are you sure about this, Spike?" Clem asked nervously. "I mean, no vampire in the world has ever done this."  
   
"Then I'll be the first one," Spike muttered, putting on his duster. He moved to the table to grab his lighter.  
   
"But this is insane," Clem went on. "It's against all the rules, all laws and gods, never forget gods, what would Lucifer say?"  
   
Spike ignored him and looked around his crypt for something he might need. He got his duster, fag and motorcycle outside, he was set. "Take good care of the place, mate," he said to the fretful demon.  
   
"Oookay, and you take good care of that neatly gelled head of yours." Clem waved a couple of fingers as Spike slammed the door shut.  
   
Spike looked up at the moon that shone on his motorcycle, and he touched the steel pensively.    
   
 **Spike:** _I have often dreamed_  
 _That I'd find a place_  
 _Where a great, warm welcome_  
 _Would be waiting for me_  
 _Where Buffy will cheer_  
 _When she sees my face_  
 _And a voice keeps saying_  
 _This is where I'm meant to be_  
  
He adjusted himself on his bike and eyed the long way ahead of him.  
   
 **Spike:** _I will find my way_  
 _I will find the demon_  
 _I'll be there someday_  
 _I won’t be the monster_  
 _I know every mile_  
 _Will be worth my while_  
 _I would go most anywhere_  
 _To be worthy of her_  
 

 

  
   
~*~*~*~

  
   
   
Spike stopped his motorbike somewhere in the highway. He looked over his shoulder at the faint lights of Sunnydale visible in the distance. His mind traveled to the painful image of Buffy crying in the bathroom, bruised and hurt. He spat away the cigarette in his mouth and rode off.  
   
 **Spike:** _I am on my way_  
 _I will find the demon_  
 _I don't care how far_  
 _I will break the rules_  
 _I know every mile_  
 _Would be worth my while_  
 _I would go most anywhere_  
 _To be worthy of her_

 

  
~*~*~*~  
  
  
  
The moon appeared through an exotic tree as Spike heard the sound of drums and African pipe music. There was a desert village made up of grass huts on sand appeared before his eyes. He walked past the frightened people, heading straight to his goal.  
  
A villager was suddenly trailing after him, trying to stop him from going forward. "Toyenza coyengara. Erio mtuwana."  
  
"Not asking for permission, mate." He walked past the man, determined.  
  
" _Ymirira! Odja kufa! Ymirira!_ " the villager warned behind him, but didn't dare to follow him anymore.  
  
Spike kept on walking forward until he found the cave where the demon lived.  
  
The cave was almost completely dark. Spike flicked open his lighter, revealing paintings on the cave walls. Images of people's faces in pain, bodies with blood pouring out of them, skulls. He took a shuddering breath and then made his way inside.  
  
He would do this.  
  
For her.  
  
He’d be the man she wanted, and then he’d be back, this time a hero.  
  


**Spike:** _I will beat the odds_   
_I will find the demon_   
_I will face its harms_   
_Fearless, proud and strong_   
_I don't care 'bout gods_   
_I will find the demon_   
_Then I'll find my hero's welcome_   
_Right where I belong_

 


	5. Buffy and the Seventy Potentials

  
** Episode: ** Post-Showtime   
** Song: ** [I'll Make a Man Out of You (Mulan)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TVcLIfSC4OE)

 

 

 

 

 

Xander could see how tired Buffy was underneath the boiling frustration. The potential slayers couldn’t even hold their stakes right let alone be allowed to swing swords. He was too worried about her, she hadn’t slept in days, and feared that she’d overwork herself to the point of a nervous breakdown.  
   
“She’s gonna explode,” Dawn next to him commented. Xander couldn’t blame Buffy if she did, but blowing up at those girls wouldn’t do her any favors.  
   
"Stop!" Buffy commanded, putting an end to the farce before her.    
   
The potentials looked at her, faces clouded with shame and resentment.  
   
Buffy pulled out a bow and arrow and aimed at a target board hung on the wall, and she made a perfect bull's-eye.  
   
Rona scoffed. "Huh, show off."  
   
"Rona," Buffy called.  
   
She jumped.  
   
Buffy handed her the bow and the arrow.  
   
Rona accepted them with a suspicious glance at Buffy. She looked at her peers, they regarded her with sympathy. Vi pulled her hat down to cover her face.  
   
Rona pursed her lips and clumsily pointed her arrow at the target center. She shot her arrow and it did hit the wall but was not even close to the target board.  
   
The potentials stifled their snickers at Rona's failure. One firm look from Buffy and everyone stopped short.  
   
Buffy nodded her head at the many bows and arrows. "Show me what you got."  
   
Everyone took a single bow and arrow and with hesitation pointed at the target board. Vi fired an arrow but it handed on the floor. The others laughed at her. “At least Rona hit the wall,” Chloe remarked.  
   
Buffy let out a frustrated sigh, and before Kennedy shot her arrow, she snatched the weapons from her. She shot the arrow through the full length of her previous one and through the target. All the potentials eyed her with awe.  
   
"So?" Rona snapped. "I bet you had years to practice. We can't get it right in one day."  
   
"I'm not sure I'll ever get it right," Chloe said pitifully. "There's a reason why men are the ones who fight war."  
   
"Yeah?" Buffy replied. "Then I'll make a man out of you. Count on it."  
   
Chloe appeared unconvinced.  
   
Buffy shot another arrow and it spitted the second one into two as well. The potentials felt smaller in her presence.  
   
 **Buffy:** _Let's get down to business_  
 _To defeat the First_  
 _I will train you even_  
 _With anger I'd burst_  
 _  
_Buffy gave the signal for the potentials to try again and as expected all their tries failed. Vi's arrow almost hit Buffy if she didn't duck.  
  
 **Buffy:** _You're the saddest bunch_  
 _I ever met_  
 _But you can bet_  
 _Before we're through_  
 _  
_She marched to Vi and looked her disgraced face down.  
  
 **Buffy:** _Sister, I'll make a man_  
 _out of you_    
  
Holding up their swords, the potentials stood up straight. Then started taking the fencing position and when they saluted, they barely kept their balance, unlike Buffy who stood still.  
   
 **Buffy:** _Tranquil as a forest_  
 _But on fire within_  
 _Once you find your center_  
 _you are sure to win_  
  
When Buffy pointed her sword ahead taking position, she heard the gasps and yelps followed by smacking bodies. She sighed in annoyance and turned around. Every potential was lying on the floor except for Kennedy who was up on her feet but with little balance.  
 _  
_ **Buffy:** _You're a spineless, pale_  
 _pathetic lot_  
 _And you haven't got a clue_  
 _Somehow I'll make a man_  
 _out of you_    
  
From their places on the ground, the potentials began murmuring to themselves.  
   
 **Rona:** _I'm never gonna catch_  
 _my breath_  
  
 **Molly:** _Say good-bye to those_  
 _who knew me_  
  
 **Chloe:** _Boy, was I a fool in school_  
 _for cutting gym_  
  
 **Dawn shaking her head** : _Buffy's got 'em_  
 _scared to death_  
  
 **Kennedy:** _Man, never thought_  
 _How hard this could be_  
  
 **Vi:** _Now I really wish that I_  
 _was born a him_    
  
"Stand up!" Buffy commanded. All obeyed.  
  
 **Potentials:** _Be a man_  
  
 **Buffy:** _We must be swift as_  
 _the coursing river_  
  
 **Potentials:** _Be a man_  
  
 **Buffy:** _With all the force_  
 _of a great typhoon_  
  
 **Potentials:** _Be a man_  
  
 **Buffy:** _With all the strength_  
 _of a raging fire_  
 _Mysterious as the_  
 _dark side of the moon_  
  
Buffy held up the weights effortlessly. The potentials took smaller weights but barely kept them up.  
  
 **Buffy:** _Time is racing toward us_  
 _till the Uber Vamps arrive_  
 _Heed my every order_  
 _and you might survive_  
  
Buffy looked over at her troop and found Vi dropping one of the weights to the floor. She gasped in embarrassment. Buffy strode toward her and picked up the weights on the ground holding it up with the other weights she had. Vi couldn't look her in the eyes.  
 _  
_ **Buffy:** _You're unsuited for_  
 _the rage of war_  
 _You will die, won’t last_  
 _you're through_  
 _How could I make a man_  
 _out of you?_  
   
Buffy’s words must have stung bad, Xander noted, watching Vi withdrawing away from the others, trying to make herself invisible.  
   
He felt his chest tightening. He understood. He’d been there before and it hurt bad to be regarded as a waste of space.  
   
When the training session was over and everybody left the basement. Vi was still there, huddled in the corner and softly crying.  
   
Xander crouched before her, noticing her flinch when she realized she wasn’t alone.  
   
Her glistening eyes looked up at him. He smiled reassuringly. "My first arrow didn't touch the wall as well."  
   
"Really?" she sniffled.  
   
"When Buffy died last year, I had practiced day and night, trying my best to get better at something. I have good eyesight. I can fire a crossbow and a regular bow and put Robin Hood to shame."  
   
She shook her head. “I don’t think I can.”  
   
“You just need to practice. I’ll help.”  
   
She smiled for the first time that day, and Xander was relieved.  
   
They had practiced for hours. Until Spike kicked them out because he needed his beauty vamp sleep.  
   
Xander hung the target board on the tree outside in the Summers’ backyard. They kept practicing until dawn – Xander wouldn’t have been this generous to stay up all night if tomorrow wasn’t a Sunday.  
   
Sunday afternoon, the potentials gathered in the basement to practice again. Buffy and Xander crossed their arms and watched.  
   
Vi held up the bow and arrow and then looked at Xander. He smiled encouragingly at her. With determination, she pointed at the target board. Her first attempt was a failure. So was her second and third but she didn't give up. All potentials looked at her attempts in amusement.  
   
Buffy pinched the bridge of her nose impatiently and was about to stop her when Xander held out his arm. “She’ll surprise you,” he said with a smile.  
   
Buffy didn’t seem to believe him but she let the girl keep trying.  
   
Vi didn't give up, she kept shooting one arrow after the other. One of her arrows finally reached its goal. The potentials started cheering her name.  
   
Vi grinned up at Buffy and Xander.  
   
Xander returned her smile.  
   
Buffy eyed him suspiciously. “You gave her a special Xander pep talk?”  
   
He shrugged.  
   
Vi shot another arrow and it hit the target resulting to more cheers from her friends.  
   
A small, proud smile crossed Buffy's lips.  
  
 **Potentials:** _Be a man_  
  
 **Buffy:** _We must be swift as_  
 _the coursing river_  
  
 **Potentials:** _Be a man_  
  
 **Buffy:** _With all the force_  
 _of a great typhoon_  
  
 **Potentials:** _Be a man_  
  
 **Buffy:** _With all the strength_  
 _of a raging fire_  
 _Mysterious as the_  
 _dark side of the moon_  
  
  
  
   
   
~*~*~*~  
 

 

  
   
 **Episode:** Post-Showtime  
 **Song:** [Bless My Soul (Hercules)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yOL-EJZjmp0)  
   
  


   
"But we're not equals," Rona complained, interrupting another empowerment speech while trying to lift the weights Buffy rented for their training.  
   
Buffy frowned at her, and that frustrated Rona even more. She dropped the weights on the floor and placed her hands on her hips, staring back at Buffy. "You have the power. We're just girls. Yes, we may become real slayers one day, but we're not yet. So far we're just normal girls. What use do we make?"  
   
"Just because you don't have the power yet, doesn’t mean you're useless." Buffy spotted Chloe and Molly, who stared back with doubt.  
   
"Oh, really?" Rona retorted.  
   
"Look at Xander." Buffy pointed at her friend. Xander, for his turn, squirmed under the attention.  
   
Rona didn't look impressed. "So?"  
   
"This man is as normal as they come. And yet, he helped stop more apocalypses than you can count. He was the one who saved the world last year."  
   
"The entire world?" Vi grinned up at Xander, already having a soft spot for him after helping her the other day.    
   
"The entire world," Buffy confirmed. "No one else, but him."  
   
The potentials eyed Xander with an admiration they hadn't felt for him before. Willow and Dawn snickered when Xander shifted from one foot to the other.  
   
"How did he save the world exac…?"  
   
Andrew popped out of nowhere, cutting Rona's question off with a squeal.   
   
 **Andrew:** _Bless my soul_  
 _Xand was on a roll_  
 _Person of the week in every SunnyD opinion poll_  
  
 **Vi in awe:** _What a pro_  
  
 **Andrew:** _Xand could stop a show_  
 _Point him at a monster and you're talking SRO_  
  
 **Potentials:** _He was a no one_  
 _A zero, zero_  
 _Now he's a honcho_  
 _He's a hero_  
  
 **Andrew:** _He was a kid with his act down pat_  
  
 **Potentials:** _From zero to hero_  
 _In no time flat_  
 _Zero to hero_  
   
 **Andrew snapped his fingers:** _Just like that_  
  
Buffy rubbed her forehead in irritation and was about to stop the pointless charade. Before she said a thing her eyes landed on Willow, who smiled and shook her head no.  
   
"I think he needs this," she whispered, nodding her head to Xander's direction. Buffy looked at Xander who almost shrunk with embarrassment, yet still looked delighted.  
    
 **Andrew:** _When he smiled_  
 _The girls went wild_  
 _With oohs and aahs_  
 _He's special because_  
 _Though he's normal_  
 _He serves a cause_  
  
 **Potentials:** _With few items he can build windows_  
 _Our Xand can do it with beans_  
 _A carpenter who knows his tools_  
 _He could tell you_  
 _What's a multitude means?_  
  
"Actually, it's a multi-tool. It's a hand tool that…" Xander corrected.  
   
 **Potentials interrupting:** _Say amen_  
 _There he goes again_  
 _Always with the tool talk_  
 _Doesn't need no board and no chalk_  
 _Folks lined up_  
 _Just to watch him flex_  
 _And this perfect package_  
 _packed a pair of pretty pecs_  
  
 _Xanny, he comes_  
 _He sees, he conquers_  
 _Honey, the crowds were_  
 _Going bonkers_  
 _He showed the moxie brains, and spunk_  
 _From zero to hero_  
   
 **Vi:** _a major hunk_  
  
 **Potentials:** _Zero to hero_  
   
 **Rona:** _and who'da thunk_  
  
 **Andrew:** _Who used talking as a weapon?_  
  
 **Potentials:** _Xander Harris!_  
  
 **Andrew:** _Whose daring deeds are due to happen?_  
  
 **Potentials:** _Xander Harris!_  
  
 **Andrew:** _Is he bold?_  
  
 **Potentials:** _No one braver_  
  
 **Andrew:** _Is he sweet?_  
  
 **Potentials:** _Our favorite flavor_  
 _Xander, Xander_  
  
 **Potentials:** _Bless my soul_  
 _Xand was on a roll_  
 _Undefeated_  
 _Riding high_  
 **Vi:** _And the nicest guy_  
 **Potentials:** _not conceited_  
  
 **Potentials:** _He was a nothin'_  
 _A zero, zero_  
 _Now he's a honcho_  
 _He's a hero_  
 _He hit the heights at breakneck speed_  
 _From zero to hero_  
 _Xand is a hero_  
 _Now he's a hero_  
 _  
_ **Andrew:** _Yes indeed!_  
   
Everyone clapped their hands for Xander in appreciation.  
   
The man in question was on the verge of turning into a giant tomato.  
   
Buffy wondered when her long time bragging friend turned into such a shy guy, but then she realized that this time it was someone else listing Xander's heroic acts.  
 

 

 

 

~*~*~*~

 

 

** Episode:  ** Post-Showtime   
** Song: ** [Just Whistle While You Work (Snow-white and the Seven Dwarfs)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YSnXNHUEodY)

 

 

So, Linda made the unthinkable and invited a vampire in. Buffy decided it was a good practice for the potentials to try and stake that vampire on their own. It was one hell of a battle that took hours until Kennedy finally staked the vampire with the broken foot of the kitchen table.  
   
Buffy was beyond shocked and dismayed that it took them this long to stake what her experienced eye could tell was a newly raised vampire.  
   
“They won’t learn if you keep them cooped up in the house,” Spike said softly, seeming to notice her distress.  
   
She stared at his understanding eyes and realized that he was right. The potentials wouldn’t learn if she kept hiding them in her house, away from harm. They had to come face to face with danger, learn how to survive on their own.  
   
"We shouldn't waste time, let's hit the cemeteries,” Buffy announced to the worn out girls.  
   
“All right!” Kennedy pumped her fist in the air and rushed out of the house, the other girls hardly dragged their feet after her.  
   
"What about the mess?" Dawn asked, looking around at the broken furniture, the stained carpets, and cracked window.  
   
Buffy looked at her friends. "You guys clean it up."  
   
They all blinked at her as she and Spike made their way out of the door.  
   
Dawn folded her arms over her chest. "I didn’t sign up to be her personal maid.”  
   
Willow helplessly shrugged. “Someone has to clean the place up.”  
   
“Okay, Willow, do your magic thing and make it spotless,” Anya suggested.  
   
“I… I can’t,” Willow said in a small voice. Xander placed a hand on her shoulder and squeezed in support.  
   
“Why not? You’re a powerful witch,” Anya sneered in apparent resentment. “Put those powers of yours to good use.”  
   
“Good use is against unstoppable evil. Not housework,” Dawn shot back.     
   
"Says the most useless one in the room,” Anya remarked.  
   
Dawn gasped. "Hey, that's rude."  
   
"AKA Anya," Willow muttered.  
   
Dawn giggled.  
   
"Of course, repairing the windows is my job," Xander declared in an attempt to break the tension more than anything. Repairing and cleaning the house every night in the past week was getting under their skin. At least, this time they had Andrew for another set of helping hands.  
   
"Xander will fix the broken window and the kitchen table. Anya and Dawn will tidy up the living room. Willow will tidy up the kitchen. And I'll use the broom to sweep the broken window glass and the hundreds of broken plates in the kitchen," Andrew cheerfully listed the house chores for everybody.  
   
"Hey, weasel, who made you boss?" Xander gritted out. Everyone else nodded.  
   
"Now, now, we mustn't lose our temper. Cleaning will be much more enjoyable if you follow my lead.”  
   
"Follow your lead?" Willow asked incredulously.  
   
 **Andrew smiled and started to sweep the floor:** _Just whistle while you work_ (he whistled)  
 _And cheerfully together we can tidy up the place_  
 _So hum a merry tune_ (he hummed)  
 _It won't take long when there's a song to help you set the pace_  
 _  
_Everyone ignored him and went on to their task. Andrew gazed lovingly at his broom.  
 _  
_ **Andrew:** _And as you sweep the room_  
 _Imagine that the broom_  
 _Is someone that you love and soon_  
 _You'll find you're dancing to the tune_  
  
 _Just whistle while you work_  
 _Put on that grin and start right in to whistle loud and long_  
 _Just hum a merry tune_  
 _Just do your best and take a rest and sing yourself a song_  
 _  
_ _When there's too much to do_  
 _Don't let it bother you,_  
 _Forget your troubles,_  
 _Try to be just like a cheerful chick-a-dee_  
 _  
_ _And whistle while you work_  
 _Come on get smart, tune up and start_  
 _To whistle while you work_  
   
Andrew smiled knowingly when everyone was humming the tune of his song.

 

 

 

~*~*~*~

 

 

** Episode: ** Potential   
** Song: ** [I Just Can't Wait to Be king (The Lion King)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l8UFnc85-xM)

 

 

 

 

 

Shocked, confused, and all emotions floating inside, Dawn walked into the living room with Xander, Willow and Anya behind her. "Maybe y…you did it wrong? Was it a-ambiguous in any way? Did you maybe say potential sailors? 'Cause I…I do like the water."  
   
"I did it right," Willow insisted.  
   
Xander stared at Dawn with wide eyes. "Wow, she…you're a potential. You could be the next slayer."  
   
Dawn's eyes grew wider. "Whoa." She sat on the sofa, enthralled. "I'm gonna be a slayer. I'm gonna be important." She looked up at them. "I'm gonna be a hot-shot hero!"  
   
Anya twisted her lips. "Well, you still aren't."  
   
Dawn jumped off the couch and approached Anya with a huge grin.  
   
 **Dawn:** _I'm gonna be a mighty slayer_  
 _Enemies beware!_  
  
 **Anya:** _Yeah, 'cause the ticket to heroism_  
 _Is shiny, silky hair_  
   
Dawn brushed Anya's fingers off her hair.  
  
 **Dawn:** _I'm gonna be the main event_  
 _Like no slayer was before_  
 _I'm brushing up on looking down_  
 _I'm working on my ROAR_  
  
 **Anya:** _Thus far, I think all you need is a prayer_  
 **Dawn:** _Oh, I just can't wait to be a slayer!_  
  
 **Anya:** _Now listen, just because you'll be a slayer, doesn't mean…_  
 **Dawn pointedly:** _No one saying useless_  
 **Anya shamefaced:** _Now when I said that, I--_  
 **Dawn:** _No one saying pointless_  
 **Anya:** _What I meant was..._  
 **Dawn:** _I'm gonna be no damsel_  
 **Anya:** _Look, what you don't realize..._  
 **Dawn:** _In fucking distress_  
 **Anya angry:** _Now see here!_  
  
 **Dawn:** _With so many possibilities_     
 **Anya:** _Now that's definitely out..._  
 **Dawn:** _And so many responsibilities_  
   
 **Anya:** _I think it's time that you and I_  
 _Arranged a heart to heart_  
 **Dawn:** _Slayers don't need advice_  
 _From ex-vengeance demons for a start_  
  
 **Anya:** _If this is where the monarchy is headed_  
 _Count me out!_  
 _Out of service, out of America_  
 _I wouldn't hang about... aagh!_  
 _If it's up to me I would delay 'er_  
 **Dawn:** _Oh, I just can't wait to be a slayer!_  
  
Dawn jumped on the sofa and started swaying and shaking her hips to the magical music.  
   
 **Dawn:** _Everybody look left_  
 _Everybody look right_  
 _Everywhere you look I'm_  
 _Standing in the spotlight!_  
 **Anya:** _Not yet!_  
   
 **Xander and Willow:** _Now wait a second, Dawn, you don't see_  
 _How exactly this arrangement's gonna be_  
 _You can not be a slayer just for free_  
 _ **Dawn:** She'll have to die first before it'll be me_  
 _She'll have to die first before it'll be me_  
   
"She'll have to die first before it'll be me," Dawn mumbled with realization. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

~*~*~*~

 

** Episode:  ** Potential   
** Song: ** [I Won’t Say I’m In Love (Hercules) ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FqDaoMtIujs)

 

 

 

 

 

The hollers and cheers erupted from inside the crypt.  
   
Buffy and Spike shared matching knowing smiles. They opened the doors and the potentials stormed out declaring victory.  
   
Rona started to babble about what she did, only to be interrupted by Molly, only to be shushed by Kennedy, and Vi simply squealed with delight.  
   
Buffy was proud and happy for them. They could finally understand what it was like. When she turned to Spike, she was caught off guard by that look in his eyes. They were warm and expressive; he knew what she was feeling at that moment. He could tell, how proud she was of what she had accomplished with the girls, how relieved, how thrilled.   
   
Captured by that look in his eyes, she barely heard the suggestive whistle.  
   
Buffy whipped her head to the girls. They all fluttered their eyelashes at her.  
   
“Uh, Spike,” Buffy blurted out, “Would you give the cemetery a good once-over?”  
   
“I don’t think…”  
   
“Now, Spike,” she insisted.  
   
He raised an eyebrow but did as told.  
   
“Why did you send him away?” Kennedy asked with an innocent head tilt that didn’t suit her.  
   
“You don’t have to hide that you’re into him,” Vi said earnestly.  
   
“Into who? Spike?” Buffy shook her head. “I’m not into Spike.”  
   
“Please.” Rona waved her off. “The temperature hits the roof every time you two even glance at each other.”  
   
“Admit it,” Kennedy urged. “You like him.”  
   
“I don’t.” Buffy started stalking off. “I’m gonna take a look around, see if…”  
   
“Gonna go after Spike?” Rona winked.  
   
Buffy glared at her and walked into the crypt instead of walking away. She realized where she went a moment later. With a sigh, she sank to the floor and inwardly cursed the cheeky potentials. She was not going down that road again. Already had a failed romance with a souled vampire. Been there. Done that. No more.  
   
No matter how weak in the knees Spike was making her feel these days.    
  
 **Buffy:** _If there's a prize for rotten judgment_  
 _I guess I've already won that_  
 _No man is worth the aggravation_  
 _That's ancient history, been there, done that!_  
  
Kennedy, Rona, Vi and Molly’s heads popped from the doorway.   
  
 **Potentials:**   _Who'd'ya think you're kiddin'_  
 _He's the Earth and heaven to you_  
 _Try to keep it hidden_  
 _Honey, we can see right through you_  
   
 **Buffy:** _Oh, nooooo_  
  
 **Potentials:** _Girl, ya can't conceal it_  
 _We know how ya feel and_  
 _Who you're thinking of_  
  
Buffy glared back at the door. The potentials were nowhere to be seen.   
  
 **Buffy:** _No chance, no way_  
 _I won't say it, no, no_  
  
 **Potentials (walking inside):** _You swoon, you sigh_  
 _why deny it, uh-oh_  
  
 **Buffy:** _It's too cliché_  
 _I won't say I'm in love_  
  
Buffy got up and walked around the coffins and mess, which were exactly what her life was with Spike last year. Death and pain blended together creating nothing but chaos.  
  
 **Buffy:** _I thought my heart had learned its lesson_  
 _It feels so good when you start out_  
 _My head is screaming get a grip, girl_  
 _Unless you're dying to cry your heart out_  
 _Oh_  
 _  
_The potentials jumped on top of a closed coffin in front of Buffy.  
  
 **Potentials:** _You keep on denying_  
 _Who you are and how you're feeling_  
 _Buffy, we're not buying_  
 _Hon, we saw ya hit the ceiling_  
 _Face it like a grown-up_  
 _When ya gonna own up_  
 _That ya got, got, got it bad_  
  
Buffy tried to run out of the crypt and away from the potentials.   
 **  
** **Buffy:** _No chance, no way_  
 _I won't say it, no, no_  
  
She noticed Spike approaching the crypt outside and a smile rose to her lips.   
  
 **Potentials:** _Give up, give in_  
 _Check the grin you're in love_  
   
Buffy wiped the smile off her face and glowered at them.   
  
 **Buffy:** _This scene won't play,_  
 _I won't say I'm in love_  
  
 **Potentials:** _You're doing flips_  
 _read our lips_  
 _You're in love_  
  
Buffy waved an angry finger in their faces.   
  
 **Buffy:** _You're way off base_  
 _I won't say it_  
 _Get off my case_  
 _I won't say it_  
  
 **Potentials:** _Girl, don't be proud_  
 _It's O.K. you're in love_  
   
“Buffy!” Spike exclaimed, walking into the crypt.   
  
 **Buffy (to herself):** _Oh_  
 _At least out loud,_  
 _I won't say I'm in love_  
  
Spike rushed toward her with a cellphone. “Willow just called.”  
   
Buffy patted her pocket. How did her phone end up with Spike?  
   
“It’s Dawn,” he said with concern.  
   
The two magic words that caught her attention. She should have known. It was Tuesday.

 

 

 

 

~*~*~*

 

 

 

** Episode: ** The Killer in Me   
** Song: ** [High Adventure (deleted song from Aladdin)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kg6cG3rHLe4)

 

Anya noticed Xander’s knuckles growing white as he clutched the phone to his ear. One of the worst things about being human was the way something squeezed her heart whenever she was afraid, and that happened quite often these days.  
   
Xander hung up the phone and with looked at her and Dawn, unable to speak for a second. “He was attacked, this Robison guy in England.” He let out a sigh as he sat down. “And Giles was there helping him. And there was a Bringer.”  
   
He appeared so grieved that Anya sat up in alarm. “Xander…”  
   
“Robson blacked out,” Xander went on, not meeting her in the eye. “But the last thing he remembers is Giles's head about to get really familiar with a Bringer's very sharp axe.”  
   
“Oh my God,” Dawn exclaimed in fear.  
   
“Giles never mentioned any of this,” Anya pointed out.  
   
“Robson said by the time he came to, there was no Giles.”  
   
Heavy silence hung thick in the air for a moment. Anya looked around her at Xander’s disturbed face and Andrew squirming in his seat. Then a troubled Dawn asked, “So, what are we saying?”  
   
Anya knew exactly what must be going on with Giles… or _not_ Giles as the case might be. This was wild. Dread and anguish filled her up and she felt she was going to choke.  
   
“Maybe Giles just didn’t wanna talk about it,” Xander said, trying to reassure Dawn and himself.  
   
Anya was never for telling lies to make others feel better. She liked hard solid facts. She used to dance around the truth of Xander not wanting to marry her last year and that bit her right in the ass.  
   
“Or maybe he didn’t make it,” Anya said the truth nobody wanted to hear. Dawn appeared really distressed. “Look, I'm not saying it's a happy scenario, but we're dealing with a big bad that can be any dead person it wants.”  
   
“Because if you want to infiltrate the inner circle of the slayer...” Xander started.  
   
“Become the one person she trusts more than anybody else,” she finished for him.  
   
“But there’s no way that we can know,” Dawn objected.  
   
“Actually that's not true,” Andrew spoke for the first time. “The First can't take corporeal form, so it can't touch anything.”  
   
“Oh, it's not like Giles hasn't touched anything, right?” Anya said lightly. But, come to think of it, Giles never hugged her upon his arrival, unlike last year when he came back all dashing and attractive trying to stop a homicidal Willow. They never shook hands. Heck, she didn’t remember him touching anything.  
   
Dawn jumped to her feet. “That’s ridiculous! Of course Giles touched something! He’d been here for weeks!”  
   
“Shouldn’t the First float, you know? He shouldn’t be able to walk on the floor, his feet aren’t meant to touch the floor,” Andrew mused.  
   
Anya glared at Dawn and Andrew. “We’ve got no time to waste! The First could be leading those girls to their death right now!”  
   
“Giles _drove_ them there. The First won’t be able to touch the stirring wheel,” Andrew snapped his finger.  
   
“Actually one of the girls did the driving. Giles didn’t renew his license,” Dawn admitted with difficulty. She glared at Anya’s raised eyebrow. “It doesn’t mean you’re right. I can’t believe Giles didn’t touch anything since he came back!”  
   
“Xander, you agree with me, right?” Anya asked her silent ex.  
   
Eyes glistening with unshed tears, Xander heaved a sigh and nodded.  
   
“Xander!” Dawn exclaimed. “You think Giles is the First?”  
   
“Dawn, I don’t want to believe it, but it seems to be the case.”  
   
“I don’t believe this!” Dawn threw up her hands in frustration.  
   
Anya glanced at the clock on the wall. They were wasting time discussing this while the potentials could be in ultimate danger.  
   
 **Anya:**   _Convince those guys, get on it, Xander._  
   
 **Xander:**   _I'm trying, Anya, but-_  
   
 **Anya:**   _Well, do it faster. Let's be gone._  
   
 **Xander:**   _Look guys, I’ve known Giles for years. He won’t come back from a long trip without giving Buffy a hug._  
  
 **Anya:**   _In wasting time we court disaster!_  
 _Pick up that sword and strap it on._  
  
 **Dawn (sarcastically):**   _Can we even kill the First with a sword? Anybody heard of the First being killed with a sword?_  
  
 **Anya:**   _Fate blows her kiss, chills your heart, takes your hand._  
   
 **Dawn:**   _I don't even know if I believe in Fate._  
   
 **Anya:**   _Fate feels like this. Play your part, this was planned._  
 _And, lo, before you know!_  
 _You grab your keys, you grab your gear, your moment's now, your moment's here._  
 _It's time for high adventure._  
 _You're off and riding, saber flashing._  
 _Your banner high, your molars gnashing._  
 _You feel so dashing on a high adventure._  
 _Get set to give some guy a thrashing, 'cause high adventure's in the air._  
  
 **Xander (standing up):**   _There's a chance Giles is dead, guys._  
 _Someone's out there, guys- someone bad._  
  
 **Anya:**   _'Atta boy, Xander. Let 'em have it!_  
   
 **Xander:**   _The girls could be damsels in despair, guys._  
 _Heck, that's not fair, guys, and I'm mad!_  
  
 **Anya:**   _Very good, Xander. Gnash those teeth!_  
  
Xander dashed to the door, followed by everybody.  
   
 **Xander:**   _Fate blows her kiss, winks her eye, tames her shrew._  
 _Has it for Anya, Dawn, and Andrew._  
  
 **All:**   _And so, we four will go!_  
 _Until it's through, until it ends! Here comes the Scooby Gang, my friends,_  
 _off on a high adventure!_  
 _To confrontations so exciting!_  
 _They're playing music while we're driving._  
 _Scratching and biting on a high adventure!_  
 _Feel that adrenaline igniting,_  
 _'cause high adventure's in the air!_  
  
The vast desert stretched out before them, Andrew clung to Dawn’s shirt as they marched behind Xander and Anya. Sneakers collecting sand, Andrew noticed the rising smoke from afar.  
  
 **Andrew:**   _Hark! Something calls like a dream and it’s gone,_  
 _calls out to Xander, Anya, and to Dawn._  
   
 **All:** _It's- wait- the voice of fate!_  
 _It calls to me, it calls to you, Anya, Xander, and the crew,_  
 _off on a high adventure!_  
 _Danger to danger we go flying!_  
 _Completely unafraid of dying!_  
  
 **Dawn:** _Andrew, stop crying._  
   
 **All:** _This is high adventure!_  
 _There's no ignoring or denying,_  
 _the kind of thrills that it's supplying._  
 _And the effect's electrifying..._  
 _When high adventure's in the air!_  
   
There he was, the First, walking around the campfire. The four brave warriors tackled it from behind. The First screamed as they pushed it to the ground.  
   
Wait a minute, the First was incorporeal, but they could touch this one.  
   
It was Giles! He was not dead!  
   
The high adventure was over quite quickly but at least it ended on a high note.


	6. And They Lived Happily Ever After

** Episode:  ** Lies My Parents Told Me   
** Song: [Proud of Your Boy (Deleted song from Aladdin)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kV3D1ASN7Xc) **

****

 

 

William stepped into the parlor where his mother’s dead body lay on the sofa. Her face, still as a statue, enhanced by the sparse light cast from the dimming flames in the fireplace. He rested on the arm of the sofa and gazed upon her face, deadly pale and not a bit healthier than before.   
   
She would be better, he told himself, stronger and more capable.  
   
Faint light was shed on his mother’s neglected walking stick on the floor. No more illness. No more pain. She’d be one of them, his mother, she’d ravage the city and lay waste to all Europe. They would always be together. And she’d be proud that he saved her. He made her who she would become, a powerful vampire, ready to conquer and destroy.  
   
Thirty years of being a burden, a bloody fool, wasted his life writing awful poetry. Men his age already had wives and children, already built a life for themselves, already hired a nurse to tend to their sick mothers.  
   
He wasn’t like other men. Those… vulgarians were million times better than him. Women didn’t think they were beneath them.  
   
But now, Drusilla recreated him, made him a better man. And he in turn recreated his mother, gave her eternal life and cured her. Finally, did well by her.       
   
 **William:** _Proud of your boy_  
 _I'll make you proud of your boy_  
 _Believe me, bad as I've been, Mother_  
 _You're in for a pleasant surprise_  
 _  
_ _I've wasted time_  
 _I've wasted me_  
 _So say I'm slow for my age_  
 _A late bloomer, Okay, I agree_  
  
 _That I've been one rotten child_  
 _Some son, some pride and some joy_  
 _But I'll get over these lousing up_  
 _Messing up, screwing up times_  
  
 _You'll see, Mother, now comes the better part_  
 _Someone's going to do well_  
 _Cross his unwise heart_  
 _Do well and finally make you_  
 _Proud of your boy_  
  
 _Tell me that I've been a louse and loafer_  
 _You won't get a fight here, no ma'am_  
 _Say I'm a goldbrick, a goof-off, no good_  
 _But that couldn't be all that I am_  
 _  
_ _Water flows under the bridge_  
 _Let it pass, let it go_  
 _There's no good reason that you should believe me_  
 _Not yet, I know, but_  
 _  
_ _Someday and soon_  
 _I'll make you proud of your boy_  
 _Though I can't make myself taller_  
 _Or smarter or handsome or wise_  
 _  
_ _I'll do my best, what else can I do ?_  
 _Since I wasn't born perfect like Father or you_  
 _Mother, I will try to_  
 _Try hard to make you_  
 _Proud of your boy_  
  
He crouched on the floor near his mother and placed a soft kiss on her forehead. Drusilla was waiting for him. He wouldn’t take long. He’d return before she rose. He’d be the first face she would see.  
   
   
   
 

 

~*~*~*~*~

 

 

 

 

****

** Episode:  ** Touched   
** Song: [You’ll Be in My Heart (Tarzan)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bxkRoAbJ0tc) **

 

 

 

There she was, in his arms, her tears wetting his shirt. He held her closer, his fingers tenderly brushing her soft hair. Anger boiled within him in waves. How could this happen? He knew Buffy was at odds with the watcher, but for him to lead a mutiny against her? And for her sister and friends to go along with it? After everything they had been through, after everything Buffy had sacrificed for them?  
   
Her hand snaked forward to grasp his own and hold on tight. Her shuddering breath angered him even more. Why would anyone want to hurt a woman like her? Why would anyone…?  
   
None of them, not even her sister, saw them as compatible. They thought he would hurt her, deceive her, funny how things worked out. He was the one there when they weren’t, the only one who believed in her.  
   
Her brushed the tears in her eyes away and planted a kiss on her forehead.  
   
 **Spike:** _Come stop your crying_  
 _It'll be all right_  
 _Just take my hand_  
 _Hold it tight_  
 _  
_ _I will protect you_  
 _From all around you_  
 _I will be here_  
 _Don't you cry_  
 _  
_ _For one so small,_  
 _You are so strong_  
 _My arms will hold you,_  
 _Keep you safe and warm_  
 _This bond between us_  
 _Can't be broken_  
 _I will be here_  
 _Don't you cry_  
 _  
_ _'Cause you'll be in my heart_  
 _Yes, you'll be in my heart_  
 _From this day on_  
 _Now and forever more_  
 _  
_ _You'll be in my heart_  
 _No matter what they say_  
 _You'll be here in my heart, always_  
 _  
_“Spike,” she whispered to his chest.  
   
“What?”  
   
“I was… I’ve never been this alone… I don’t know what I would have done if you…”  
   
He placed a finger on her trembling lips. “You’re not alone, Buffy.”  
   
She squeezed his hand for reassurance. He squeezed back. He wondered though, if she had let him leave…  
   
 _“I’m not ready for you to leave yet.”_ It was as if she knew that one day he would be the only one by her side. She didn’t let him slip away when he asked. She wanted him to stay, much to the watcher’s annoyance. Everything she did for him, getting rid of the chip, believing in him, Spike wanted to stay forever, but who knew what the future would hold.  
   
She needed to be strong on her own, to believe in herself, to show those wankers what she was capable of.  
   
She looked up at him, eyes determined behind the tears, and he was relieved. This was the Buffy he knew.   


 **Spike:** _Why can't they understand_  
 _The way we feel  
They just don't trust  
What they can't explain  
I know we're different but,  
Deep inside us  
We're not that different at all  
  
And you'll be in my heart  
Yes, you'll be in my heart  
From this day on  
Now and forever more  
  
Don't listen to them  
'Cause what do they know  
We need each other,  
To have, to hold  
They'll see in time  
I know  
  
When destiny calls you  
You must be strong  
I may not be with you  
But you've got to hold on  
They'll see in time  
I know  
We'll show them together  
  
'Cause you'll be in my heart  
Believe me, you'll be in my heart  
From this day on  
Now and forever more  
  
_She finally fell asleep. He gently laid her on the mattress and spooned her, whispering in her ear, _  
  
_**Spike:** _I'll be with you  
I'll be there for you always  
Always and always  
Just look over your shoulder  
Just look over your shoulder  
Just look over your shoulder  
I'll be there always_

~*~*~*~*~

 

 

 

** Episode: ** End of Days   
** Song: ** [You Got a Friend in Me (Toy Story)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=be6-VJ7KV3Y)

 

 

   
Willow turned on her laptop to research the axe thing Buffy found. Giles was too fascinated by it, he kept swinging it everywhere.  
   
So, Buffy was back. Clearly. Everyone appeared relieved when she walked into the house. Amanda commented that they were punished for choosing Faith over her, even Kennedy seemed too apologetic.  
   
Buffy didn’t want to think about it that way. Faith made the wrong call. Well, guess what, _Buffy_ made the wrong call before. These things happened.    
   
She just… she wanted to get past this, skip it all to the part where they all saved the world again. All these years, it wasn’t just her, it was all of them, and all of them had to stick together.  
   
Maybe not all, she thought solemnly.  
   
“Where’s Xander?” she asked Willow, who was already typing and checking websites.  
   
“I don’t know.” Shouldn’t talk to Willow when she was in research mode. Buffy walked down the hall. Last time she’d seen him he was standing by Faith’s side in her bedroom.  
   
“Xander?”  
   
There were two potentials tending to Faith. “He went to the bathroom,” one of them answered in hushed tones. Their names escaped her. They appeared scared and uncertain. Two powerful slayers had failed them. They lost hope, already preparing to die.  
   
Buffy hardened her heart and left the room, heading straight to the bathroom.  
   
Her heart didn’t harden enough because it sank to the pit of her stomach. The terrible sight of Xander’s injured eye, uncovered, took her off guard.  
   
Xander startled when he noticed her standing at the door and quickly reached for his eyepatch to cover up. “S-sorry. I was just cleaning it.”  
   
Shame burst in her, she must have looked so horrified. “No, no, it’s… okay. Do you, do you want some help?” She glanced at the saline solution on the sink awkwardly.  
   
“Nah, I’m done.” He placed the bottle inside the box and put it in the medicine cabinet.  
   
“Can we talk in private?” she asked abruptly, desperately wanting an end to the awkward scene.  
   
He nodded right away. “Sure.”  
   
A bunch of potentials walked down the hall, complaining loudly.  
   
“Kitchen?” she suggested.  
   
As she expected, Xander didn’t like her plan at all. He quickly assumed it was Buffy trying to protect him, and if she was honest with herself, it was. Partly. She really meant it when she told him that she trusted him with her life. He was the only one she trusted to protect Dawn and give her the normal life she never had. That was why she wanted them both away. She needed to make sure they were safe, kinda like when she sent her mother away before the fight against the mayor, which worked out pretty well.  
   
So, there they were, on the kitchen floor, sitting side by side and making jokes about dying. Same old, same old.  
   
“It sucks,” he said after a long moment of silence, “That I’m not gonna be fighting the big battle with you. I was there for every fight. It just…”  
   
She reached for his hand and grasped it tight. “I told you, I want Dawn to be safe. I trust no one with her but you.”  
   
He looked into her eyes and she hoped the sincerity of what she said was reflected in them. “Sure. What are friends for.”  
   
She smiled. She could always count on her Xander-shaped friend.  
   
 **Xander [nudging her knee with his own]:** _You've got a friend in me_  
 **Buffy [nudged back]:** _You've got a friend in me_  
 _When the road looks rough ahead_  
 _And you're miles and miles from your nice warm bed_  
 **Xander:** _Just remember what your old pal said_  
 _For you've got a friend in me_  
 **Buffy:** _Yeah, you've got a friend in me_  
   
She clasped his hand and rested her head on his shoulder, staring at their matching denim jackets. She remembered when they bought them last summer. They formed a tight family with Dawn over the summer when no one was around but the three of them. It was why he was the right man to take Dawn away. He was family in a way the others weren’t since last year. 

  
 **Buffy:** _You've got a friend in me_  
 **Xander:** _You've got a friend in me_  
 **Buffy:** _If you got troubles_

 **Xander:** _I got 'em too  
There isn't anything I wouldn't do for you_  
 **Buffy:** _We stick together, we see it through  
‘Cause you've got a friend in me_  
 **Xander:** _Yeah, you've got a friend in me_

“What are you two doing?” Dawn asked, arms crossed and eyebrows reaching her hairline.  
   
They looked at each other. It was time to act on their plan.  

 

 

 

~*~*~*~*~

 

 

 

** Episode: ** Chosen   
** Song: ** [Nobody Else but You (A Goofy Movie)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kLtff16mZq0)

 

 

  

  
Buffy looked over at her room, lost in memory lane. She just went in there for a different pair of pants. But seeing her old stuffed pig hidden underneath a pile of clothes inside her closet, she couldn’t help but remember her first day in this room. Nervous about school and making new friends, determined to leave all the slaying business behind her. Her first day in Sunnydale High started perfectly normal until she went into the library and met…  
   
"That was a lovely speech you gave out there," the softly spoken words placed a smile on her lips. She turned around and was greeted by Giles’ affectionate gaze.    
   
"You mean it?" she whispered, suddenly feeling the thick, uncomfortable air between them. She hated this new feeling she had around him. It wasn't like she couldn't stand the sight of him anymore… well, it was like that for a while, but now… it was just uncomfortable and bitter.  
   
She used to always feel such at ease around him, feel protected and contented. She wasn't sure she would get that feeling back, but she really wished to and that was the start, right?  
   
"Why would I lie?" The lines around his eyes deepened.  
   
Buffy shrugged and looked away, her eyes focusing on Mr. Gordo in her hands. "Seems like you don't trust my judgment lately."  
   
Something ached in her heart as she waited for his reaction to that. The firm line of her mouth went still when she heard him sigh. "You mean how I tried to keep you distracted while Wood attempted to kill Spike?"  
   
Her fingers lightly played with her pig’s soft fur and she remained silent. She had been constantly disappointed by him and disappointing him for the past two years and for them to have that special bond again was a possibility million miles away.   
   
“Last time I came face to face with a god I lost my life.” She looked at him. “I don’t like my chances tomorrow.”  
   
He just stared at her.  
   
“I just don’t…”  
   
“Me neither,” he interrupted faintly.  
   
There was a heavy load in her chest and a lump in her throat. Never thought the day she’d feel this weirded out and scratchy around Giles would come. This man… this man who made it so easy in the past. The man whom she felt closer to as a parent than her own mother. Didn’t judge her for sleeping with Angel. Didn’t judge her for running away. What the hell happened this year?  
   
She sat on her bed, still clutching Mr. Gordo tightly.  
   
 **Buffy:** _There are times you drive me, shall we say, bananas_  
 _And your mind is missing, no offence, a screw_  
  
 **Giles smiling:** _None taken_  
  
 **Buffy:** _Still, whatever mess I land in_  
 _Who is always understandin'?_  
 _Nobody else but you_  
  
Giles sighed and walked over to her window.  
  
 **Giles:** _Oh, your moodiness is, now and then, bewilderin'_  
 _And your values may be, so to speak, askew_  
  
 **Buffy grinning:** _Guzoonheit_  
  
Giles rolled his eyes.  
 _  
_ **Giles:** _Who deserves a hero's trophy_  
 _As we face each catastrophe?_  
 _Nobody else but you_  
  
Giles moved to sit beside her with his hand on her shoulder.   
  
 **Both:** _Nobody else buy you_  
 _It's just our luck_  
 _We're stuck together_  
  
 _Nobody else but you_  
 _Is crazy enough to believe we'll come through_  
  
 **Buffy:** _So your jokes are all, let's face it, pre-historic_  
  
 **Giles:** _And your music sounds like monkeys in a zoo_  
  
 **Both:** _But when life becomes distressin'_  
 _Who'll I be S.O.S'in?_  
  
 **Buffy:** _If you're having trouble guessing, here's a clue_  
 _Though he used to be super stuffy_  
 _He’s now all rugged and scruffy_ (she touched the growing stubble on his chin)  
 _And he's nobody else but_  
  
 **Both:** _Nobody else but you_  
 _We've turned into a true-blue duo_  
 _Hard times we've had a few_  
  
 **Giles:** _Like we're thrown in the drink_  
  
 **Buffy:** _Like we're tossed outta town_  
  
 **Both:** _But when I start to sink,_  
 _Then I'd rather go down_  
 _With nobody else but Y-O-U!_  
   
“We’re going to make it, Buffy.” Giles tightened his grasp on her shoulder. “Your plan will work.”  
   
Taken by the affection in his eyes, she replied, “I hope you’re right.”

 

 

 

~*~*~*~

 

 

 

** Episode: ** Chosen   
** Song ** : [If I Never Knew You (Pocahontas)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3DklHMnx-3s)

 

 

 

Anya felt as cranky as she looked.  
   
This was what could be their last night ever alive and Xander was wasting it on a stupid board game. He didn’t even bring Life, Anya’s favorite. But would Xander think about what she wanted? No, sir. Obviously if he did, he would have married her last year instead of ditching her at the altar.   
   
She puffed a few locks that fell on her face, watching her angry reflection on the bathroom mirror.  
   
Knock. Knock. “Anya?”  
   
It was _him._     
   
“Honey, would you unlock the door please?”  
   
She felt a smug smirk unfurl. He came to apologize. Like that would be enough.  
   
“Ahn, I have a bunch of squirming girls so close to wizz in their pants.”  
   
She fumed. The nerve! What did she expect? She was dealing with the king of clueless. That teenage movie should have been named after him.  
   
She unlocked the door and stormed out in a huff.  
   
“Anya?”  
   
He grabbed her arm and gently turned her around. “What’s wrong?”  
   
“This is the night before the big battle and you wanna spend it playing board games in the kitchen?”  
   
He looked confused. Shocking. “What else should I do?”  
   
She wanted to pull her hair out. She settled for an aggravated grunt and attempted to walk away again, except his hand was still holding her arm.  
   
“Did you wanna do something else?”  
   
Anya threw her arms in the air. “Clueless boy finally gets a clue!”  
   
He stared at her, long and thorough. “You wanted to spend the night with me.”  
   
“We had sex, Xander. What do you think that meant?”  
   
His single eye gazed down at the floor. “I don’t know. Last time we had sex in the basement you said that we were over.”  
   
She felt a bang in her chest. Still, he should know she didn’t really mean it. That she was protecting herself. “You’ve always been bad at reading between the lines.”  
   
A small smile. “Told you, I hear the actual words and accept them at face value.”  
   
“That’s stupid,” she joked with a smile.  
   
He lost his own, a serious grimace took over his face. “You’re right. I am stupid. I’m the stupid jerk who caused you pain. You probably would have been better off not knowing me.”  
   
Anya’s eyes widened. “Xander…”  
   
He shook his head. “Look, after what we did to Buffy… I kept thinking about all the crap I pulled… hurting you was on top of the list.” He fidgeted with his eyepatch. “Maybe if we never went to Prom together… if you never came back… maybe you’d have been happier.”  
   
“Happier?” she exclaimed. “Xander, no one wanted to have anything to do with me. I would have been completely alone!”  
“Better than being humiliated at the altar, better than…”  
   
“Xander…” She grabbed his arm and looked into his lonely eye.  
  
 **Anya:** _If I never knew you_  
 _If I never felt this love_  
 _I would have no inkling of_  
 _How precious life can be_  
 _  
_ _And if I never held you_  
 _I would never have a clue_  
 _How at last I'd find in you_  
 _The missing part of me_  
  
 _In this world so full of fear_  
 _Full of rage and lies_  
 _I can see the truth so clear_  
 _In your eye_  
 _So dry your eye_  
 _  
_ _And I'm so grateful to you_  
 _I'd have lived my whole life through_  
 _Lost forever_  
 _If I never knew you_  
  
Xander blinked his misty eye. “You mean it? You don’t regret…”  
   
Anya shook her head. “Meeting you? No. How it ended? Well…”  
   
“I’m sorry,” he said gravely.  
   
“You said that a hundred times,” she pointed out. “Do you still love me?”  
   
“Yes,” said without a moment pause.  
   
“Do you think your life would have been better if I wasn’t in it?”  
   
“Anya…”  
  
 **Xander:** _If I never knew you_  
 _I'd be safe but half as real_  
 _Never knowing I could feel_  
 _A love so strong and true_  
 _  
_ _I'm so grateful to you_  
 _I'd have lived my whole life through_  
 _Lost forever_  
 _If I never knew you_  
  
 **Anya:** _I thought our love would be so beautiful_  
  
 **Xander:** _Somehow we made the whole world bright_  
  
 **Both:** _I never knew that fear and hate could be so strong_  
 _All they'd leave us where these whispers in the night_  
 _But still my heart is singing_  
 _We were right_  
 _  
_ **Xander:** _If I never knew you_  
 _If I never knew this love_  
 _I would have no inkling of_  
 _How precious life can be_  
  
 **Anya:** _There's no moment I regret_  
 _Since the moment that we met_  
 _If our time has gone too fast_  
 _I've lived at last..._  
  
 **Both:** _I thought our love would be so beautiful_  
 _Somehow we'd make the whole world bright_  
  
 **Xander:** _I thought our love would be so beautiful_  
 _We'd turn the darkness into light_  
 _  
_ **Both:** _And still my heart is singing_  
 _We were right_  
 _  
_ **Anya:** _We were right_  
 _And If I never knew you_  
 _I'd have lived my whole life through_  
  
 **Xander:** _Empty as the sky_  
  
 **Both:** _Never knowing why_  
 _Lost forever_  
 _If I never knew you_  
  
The deep kiss that followed was interrupted by Andrew’s sobbing. “Giles is getting testy,” Andrew said between hiccups. “He wants to know if you’re in or not, but this is so beautiful, I’ll tell him I didn’t find you.” He skipped out of the room, wiping his tears.  
   
Anya and Xander smiled at each other and leaned in for another kiss.  


 

 

   
~*~*~*~  
 

 

  
  
** Episode:  ** Chosen   
** Song: ** [ We Are One (Lion King 2) ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dw9KNP1OTG8)   
  


 

 

 

Buffy watched Dawn head down the school hall, no hugs or goodbyes, her sister believed they would survive and so did Buffy.  
   
She turned around and a small smile curled up her lips. It all began with the four of them, after everything that happened, the four of them still stood together to fight another battle. None of them imagined it would turn out this way, all the heartbreak and all the people they lost. All the changes… they were inevitable, but they made them stronger.    
  
 **Buffy:** _As you go through life you'll see_  
 _There is so much that we_  
 _Don't understand_  
 _And the only thing we know_  
 _Is things don't always go_  
 _The way we planned_  
  
 **Xander:** _But you'll see every day_  
 _That we'll never turn away_  
 _When it seems all your dreams come undone_  
  
 **Willow:** _We will stand by your side_  
 _Filled with hope and filled with pride_  
 _We are more than we are_  
 _We are one_  
  
 **Buffy [placing a hand on Willow’s shoulder]:** _Even those who are gone_  
 _Are with us as we go on_  
 _Our journey has only begun_  
  
It wasn’t just Tara. All of them had lost that special someone, and that loss had affected their outlook on life greatly. Buffy grew up fast after her mother’s death. She had to sacrifice her education for her own sister. Xander’s world was colored in hate and resentment after Jesse’s death. Giles’ loneliness intensified after losing Jenny, and Willow had gone to a dark place after Warren killed Tara.  
   
They had been through it all together. Everything. And they’d go through more happiness and sadness together.   
 _  
_ **Buffy:** _Tears of pain, tears of joy_  
 _One thing nothing can destroy_  
 _Is our pride, deep inside_  
 _We are one_  
  
 _We are one, you and I_  
 _We are like the earth and sky_  
 _One family under the sun_  
  
 **Giles:** _All the wisdom to lead_  
 _All the courage that you need_  
 _You will find when you see_  
 _We are one_  
  
Confident smiles were shared followed by long, uncomfortable silence.  
   
“So, what do you guys wanna do tomorrow?”

 

 

 

 

~*~*~*~

 

 

He was cleaning his damaged eye again when she found him in the bathroom of his and Giles’ shared motel room.  “How you holding up?” Buffy asked softly.  
   
Xander put his eyepatch on. “Masculine bra isn’t working well for me today.”  
   
Buffy raised an eyebrow.  
   
“Sorry. Jokes of Mr. Upbeat Guy aren’t top notch when I’m downbeat.” He walked out of the room and tossed the saline solution into his opened duffle bag. He sat down on his bed and stared up at her with a blank eye. “What about you?”  
   
Arms folded tightly over her chest, she shrugged. “I’m dealing.”  
   
He lowered his gaze to his dirty boots. “I keep waiting for our sad duet.”  
   
That almost brought a smile to her lips. “It’s been quiet.”  
   
“Guess the singing curse disappeared with the Hellmouth.”  
   
“Guess so.” She sighed. “I came here to tell you that dinner is here. We’re… celebrating in Willow and Kennedy’s room.”  
   
He shook his head. “I don’t feel much like celebrating.”  
   
“Me neither,” she admitted softly.  
   
They stared at each other for a moment and then he patted the spot next to him.    
   
They sat together in dead silence.  
   
Waiting for the music that wasn’t coming.

 

 

**The End**

 


End file.
